1. You always end up smack in the middle of two people fighting
I mean, you try to escape. When it comes to flight or fight, you are flapping those damn wings of yours as fast as you can. But sometimes, you just get stuck between people you love. You don’t want to be on either side, but also don’t NOT want to be on either side. WHAT CAN YOU DO?! “That was a good point! Ohh, but yeah, that was also a great point. You’re both SO right!”
2. You’ve been called a pushover
And you absolutely hate it. Suuuuure, you try really, really, reaallllyyy hard to make sure everyone is happy, but hey, that’s not always a bad thing! When it really counts, you can stand up for yourself. You just choose battles wisely, OKAY? *crawls back under a rock*
3. You apologize when someone bumps into you
Even when they clearly ran into you. Or if it’s a mannequin. Or a chair. You’re just super polite…
4. That “which way are you gonna walk?” dance with an oncoming stranger is the absolute worst
You start to go left, they start to go left. Right. WHY ARE THEY GOING RIGHT TOO?! You’re both just trying to walk past, and now you’ve stumbled into the most docile, accidental confrontation ever. Nervous laughter and mumbled apologies are kind of your bread and butter. You’ll get through this.
5. You’ll eat food you didn’t order
You just feel really bad stressing out the waiter or waitress when the restaurant is so damn busy, and this food looks great too. It’s okay…seriously, you’re fine. Maybe you secretly wanted fish tacos, who’s to really say??!
6. You don’t correct people who mispronounce your name
Fun story, my full name is Arielle. I got called “Areola” once and just totally let it slide. High school was fuuuuuun.
7. You anticipate people cutting you in line, and you’re kind of fine with it
What’s the rush? We’re all going to get there eventually. So go ahead, clearly that person just REALLY needs to be somewhere. You rationalize it, oh they had some super important appointment! Go ahead, sir! Good luck with your test results!!
8. You always let people in on the freeway
You feel like Oprah, so generous with your driving. YOU GET AHEAD OF ME! YOU GET AHEAD OF ME! YOU ALLLLL GET AHEAD OF ME IN THIS LAAAAANEEEEE!
9. You get serious anxiety if someone calls you and then doesn’t leave a voicemail or text explaining why
ARE THEY MAD? Did you do something? THE CHOICES ARE ENDLESS. You can just feel your ulcer starting, and it’s NOT okay.
10. You say, “Sure! I’d love to catch up soon!” to that person you can’t stand
The idea of hurting someone is the worst thing ever, even if you really don’t like that person, so you’ll agree to plans you have zero interest in doing. It’s not that you can’t say no. But yeah…you can’t say no.
11. You’ve mastered the art of white lies
Honesty is a crucial part of all relationships, sure. But when you like to avoid fights, confrontation, or just doing anything that might cause some discomfort, you figure out how to word certain things juuuust right. Like of course you have the cutest baby I’ve ever seen. Definitely…
12. You’re the first to let an argument go (even if you were right)
If someone keeps insisting, you’ll just go along with it. Why rock the damn boat? You hate sea sickness! Plus, you know in your heart of hearts your Friends knowledge is way better than the person you were debating, so just let it go. SURE, go ahead and let them think Chandler’s middle name is Miriam. YOU KNOW IT’S MURIEL.