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10 Strangely Beautiful Things That Happen After Not Being In A Relationship For A Long Time

1. You’re not scared to be alone.

Silence doesn’t bother you at all. Not having a company doesn’t freak you out. You’re learning that loneliness and being alone are two different things with different meanings. You don’t feel sad when you have no one beside you, when almost all your friends are settling down in their lives, when people ask you if you’re dating someone. You’re not afraid and embarrassed to admit that you’re single because you’re happy about it. Your heart feels joyous to embrace it.

2. You rarely ask for help.

You like to do things on your own. You always want to get that accomplishing feeling of being able to have something done without necessarily asking someone how to do it. You live in an era when almost all the information can be accessed in just a tap of your finger — and you want to fully utilize this privilege. You want to obtain answers from your questions independently. People have some other things to do too, and you don’t want to add more hustle in their already busy lives.

3. You can eat alone at a restaurant.

And not feel insecure about it. You can enjoy your meal, watch people around you, and not pretend to text someone else just to appear busy. You can sit in the middle of a restaurant calmly and blend in. The best thing about dating yourself is that you get to see the details of your surroundings more, you become more aware about your thoughts, and you appreciate the moments that you put yourself into.

4. You learn to manage your problems.

You don’t want to drag other people down with your dramas in life so you become a hero for yourself. If there’s anyone who knows yourself better — it’s you. Being independent means finding ways to take good care of yourself and coming up with a solution to your problem. You don’t call someone when you’re in trouble because you know you’re old enough to clean your mess. You are the captain of your own boat and whatever storm that whirls in your direction, you’re confident that you can survive it and come out of it stronger.

5. You make your happiness.

You are at this stage in life when you understand that it’s pointless to rely on other people for happiness. It’s risky to place your heart in their hands and let them decide whether to take good care of it or crush it. Happiness ultimately comes from your soul, from your heart. You’re the one who creates it and decides where you can find it. Material things can be lost and people can be gone in an instant. At the end of the day, all you have is yourself, and learning to become your own best friend somehow protects your feelings from getting hurt.

6. You always put yourself first.

To you, it’s not selfish to choose yourself first before anything or anyone else. You’re tired of sacrificing your efforts and time for someone who ends up letting you down. You’re prioritizing yourself this time around because you deserve all the best in this world, and you never ever settle for less. You put yourself first to let everyone know that you deserve to be more than just an option; you deserve to be more than just a second thought.

7. You show people how to respect you.

You don’t let anyone take you for granted. You don’t let anyone underestimate you. If someone’s not treating you fairly, you show them how you’re supposed to be treated. You show them that you’re the kind of person who has dignity and is respectable. You know your strength and what you’re capable of and you never ever allow anyone extinguish the fire in your heart.

8. You stand by your principles.

It takes a lot of time and convincing for you to believe in someone else’s thoughts and opinions. You don’t patronize a product or service just because almost everyone loves it. You don’t go and check the place everyone’s talking about. And you don’t get easily influenced by people no matter how powerful and popular they are. You never deviate from your principles in life and you always follow what you believe is right. You live your own truth. And you don’t try to pretend to be the kind of person you are not.

9. You know who you are from inside out.

Not caring about what other people think is one of the things that you’re good at. You’ve reached a point in life when you’ve realized that it’s a waste of energy to wonder and consider someone’s reaction before doing something that you want. You love yourself too much to ever pay attention to petty, irrelevant criticisms. You’re not here to please those who aren’t important to you. Ensuring that people are comfortable with the way you present yourself around them is only going to make you unhappy in the long run. And you’re smart enough to take a step back and walk away from people who have so much to say about who you should be.

10. You like to spend time on your own.

Because it’s fun and less complicated. When you spend time alone, you get to know yourself more. You get to figure out the things that you want in your future, the kind of people that you want to be part of your life, and the goals that you want to achieve. You like it when you get lost in your own thoughts, in the silence around you, because it allows you to look back and be amazed at how much you’ve changed. You get to realize that loneliness doesn’t tear you down. In fact, it even builds you up to become a stronger, more independent person. TC mark

Image Credit: Kinga Cichewicz

Angelo Caerlang

Angelo Caerlang is the author of Sparks in Broken Lights.