I just couldn’t look you in the eyes anymore to convince myself everything hasn’t changed. Because it has. You changed.
When we see something that we could feed to our starving egos, we sprint right to it and attack. But we are so engrossed with feeding and boosting our own egos that that we forget what we feed on – other women’s’ self esteem.
My husband knew that he was gay. For that, he didn’t have to ruin my life. He didn’t have to marry me.
No one tells you you’ll spend the next six months wide awake at night staring at your ceiling, reliving the moment he pushed himself inside you without your permission.
I was left in my bed asking myself if I wanted it. If what had just happened had been consensual.
Yes I overthink, but I also over-love.
I remember you kissing me in my living room while my mom was away.
The thought of loving someone so much, of being so captivated by someone, only to have them ripped from you will take it’s toll on your heart and mind.
I was scared lose you. I was scared other girls were going to fall in love with you and see what I saw in you. Freighted that the boy I loved so much would soon realize there is someone else out there that is better than me.
For 27 years of my life I lived on my terms and conditions, was loved by everybody. I was my mom’s lifeline, my dad’s princess, my siblings’ confidante, a little angel, a punching bag and what not; until one fine day, I was married off and my life took a drastic turn.