20. I have vaginismus.
“I’ve only had full-on sex with two guys. First was my ex and the second was a one-night stand. My biggest fear is the fact that I can’t physically have sex. I have this condition that basically closes up my vagina walls when a dick tries to penetrate me. I discovered this with my ex as we were both virgins, and even though the fact that I couldn’t have sex bothered me sometimes, it led to a lot of fun discoveries with him (we found lots of alternative ways to get off hehe). I don’t feel comfortable showing these alternatives to new partners and it’s really embarrassing to have to explain my condition. During my one-night stand, the guy kept trying to force himself in me even when I was telling him to stop because it was hurting. I’ve fooled around with several guys afterwards but would never attempt ‘sex’ again because of how embarrassed I am of my situation and how I’m scared they might not find my alternatives fun. Great, this makes me miss sex with my ex. Although we couldn’t have ‘sex,’ our sex life nonetheless was amazing.”
