8 Awkward Things Nobody Acknowledges About Having A Vagina

Vaginal sweating. Yes, it’s a thing. No, I’m not going to describe it to you.

Updated 10 years ago, March 27, 2015

Though male bodies are often used for humor in the media, female bodies are typically depicted as delicate, pristine, and best suited as sexual objects.

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Sorry to burst your bubble, guys, but as a newly popular genre of humor from female comedians (think of the show Girls or the movie Bridesmaids) has unabashedly acknowledged, females pee, poop, fart, and generally hold the potential for awkwardness.

Here are a few awkward tribulations of those with vaginas that are not normally, er, exposed.

1. Bathing suit bottoms

What cruel person decided that bathing suit bottoms would be cut to ensure that your pubes stick out at least a little?

2. Trying to guess what the wet feeling in your underwear is

Am I getting my period, or am I just turned on? Both? Neither?

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3. Vaginal sweating

Yes, it’s a thing. No, I’m not going to describe it to you. But if curiosity gets the best of you, you can read about it here and here.

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4. When the saddle of your bike feels like it’s sinking into your crotch

And you’re awkwardly hovering above the seat as you ride to give your poor vagina a break.

5. When your period gives you diarrhea

Yup, it happens. Science says so. Oh, and apparently taking painkillers during labor also gives you some excretory problems.

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6. Camel toe

Do I try to fix it? Or will it get even more awkward if I reach down there?

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7. Trying not to itch in public when you have a yeast infection

But you want to so badly.

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8. When you reach into your bag for your glasses and a tampon flies out

It’s especially fun when this occurs during a date or job interview.

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So, can we once and for all stop putting vaginas on pedestals and let them be the awkward creatures they are?

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