Look in the mirror, go have a few drinks, and then go back and look in the mirror again.
Read a bunch of motivational body image quotes – “The only person you need to be better than is the person you were yesterday” (And look at the bright side, if you’re really out of shape it shouldn’t be too challenging).
Take as many selfies as you need to in order to get one where you look like Mary Kate Olsen.
Call your mom, best friend, or sister and ask them if you’re fat (then pause and wait for the uplifting compliments).
Go grocery shopping and buy a ton of green vegetables, fill your fridge up. I always do this after a good cake and ice cream binge. It reminds me that tomorrow is a new day (oh and that I just spent like $250 on veggies so there is no way I’m not going to eat them).
Hang out with someone who is a lot bigger than you.
Google “morbid obesity,” click images, and scroll through. It’s also helpful to Google image search “skinny fat before and after” pictures of celebrities. A few of my favorites include: Janet Jackson, Rob Kardashian, Lady Gaga and Kevin Federline.
Put on a nice dress, find a construction site and walk past it.
Join a gym (you don’t actually have to work out, just go in and join).
Model bashing: because we all know they set an impossible standard.
