1. Some people just don’t want to be your friend
Everyone has that one friend we always feel rejected by. We constantly try to make plans with them to hang out but we’re always met with some explanation of “You know, this week is just really insane. I could do a lunch from 2:10 to 2:20 three weeks from now though…” They make themselves seem like the busiest person on Planet Earth. Busier than James Franco! How could they ever have a moment to see a friend for drinks? Don’t you just know how positively swamped they are?! You’re so insensitive, flaunting around your balanced life of work and socializing. The Busiest Person On Earth is preoccupied with canceling plans to hang out and walking swiftly to Very Important Places—places that you can’t come to!
Yeah, this is a load of BS. I know you’re trying to keep the friendship flame alive but you should just stop trying and salvage some dignity. No one is ever too busy to hang out with someone they genuinely want to see. You make time for the right people. You prioritize. If a friend is constantly flaking, they’re basically telling you that they’re just not that interested in maintaining the friendship. Sowwy.
2. You can’t change people…most of the time
Human beings have this nasty habit of wanting to save other people. We think that with the right amount of TLC, we can change the foundation of someone’s personality and mold them into being the perfect partner.
Well, newsflash: it ain’t true. While a good relationship should cause both parties to make improvements, you can’t date a fixer-upper expecting a Persian Palace at the end of it. People only change if they want to. It doesn’t matter how many reassuring love pats you give them. If they’re not down to be, like, a good person, all your hard work is essentially fruitless. Go get a new hobby. Preferably something that’s not so detrimental to your self-esteem.
3. You’re a terrible drunk.
If you’re one of those people who, when they drink, morphs into a wild, scary animal, chances are you got some problems and drinking is only magnifying them. Getting wasted shouldn’t cause to you turn into something unrecognizable. It should just make you looser, happier, stupid, and starving. But hearing a friend tell you that you’re scary/annoying when you’re drunk NEVER feels good. In your mind, you’re just really wild! The life of the party! Everyone’s on the same level as you, right? Um, no. You’re a hot mess. Please stop drinking.
4. You’re in a crappy relationship
This is a really sticky situation. How do you tell a close friend that they’re in a terrible relationship? Not just garden variety “Your special person is lame and we don’t really click!” but like “Your special person is not special. They’re actually ruining your life!” No one wants to hear that! Need I remind you that love is deaf, dumb, and blind?! When you’re in a bad relationship, you learn to rationalize all of it. In your mind, it’s fine and even if you’re aware of it being unhealthy, you’re used to it so back off, concerned friends! You’re just jealous! You wish you could be loved like this! Um, yeah. People are crazy when they’re sleeping with crazy people. This is a truth no one likes to hear and it’d probably be best to just wait it out until your friend comes to their senses. If they get engaged, you can put your foot down, I guess.
5. Yeah, that outfit does make you look weird
Am I the only one who likes to be told when an outfit makes my body look weird? If you’re my friend, it’s your job to tell me if the clothes I’m wearing aren’t doing me any favors. This isn’t about me thinking I’m fat. It’s about the very real deceptive nature of clothes. A pair of jeans can make you look ten pounds heavier or lighter. A shirt, depending on how it’s cut, is going to either make me look buff or dumpy. So tell me the truth. I can handle the truth!