1. Just because you are going through hell right now, doesn’t mean you will never ever smile again. Pain is purely temporary. Remember that before you give up and decide you will never be whole again.
2. A year from now, you are going to be an entirely different person. You would have shed this skin made of pain and heartache and become someone stronger, more compassionate and better. Every day that passes, you grow further and further from the thing that caused you pain.
3. Forgive yourself. Learn this and relearn this every single day. For as long as it takes for it to sink in. You are human, you are allowed your flaws, you are allowed to be in pain, and your journey does not have to be hindered with self criticism. You have enough to deal with. So forgive yourself the person pain makes of you.
4. Self care is so important. You cannot look after anyone else, unless you learn how to look after yourself. Take care of your mind, your body and your soul. Don’t allow anyone to tell you that you are being selfish during this time. Be kinder to yourself by allowing yourself the time you need to heal and grow.
5. Not every friendship was built to last. You will find, that during your time of great pain and need, a lot of friends will not be there for you. They were there for you because you fulfilled a role in their lives. Now that you are hurting, these are the kind of people who will turn their backs on you. Understand that there is no better way of knowing who your real friends are, unless you face great pain in your life.
6. Let your pain teach you empathy. Let your pain teach you strength. Allow it to show you that you are unstoppable and indestructible and draw on this when you face trauma or any kind of heartache again. Remember that you have been here before, and that you are stronger than anything life throws at you.
7. Stop trying to be there for everyone all the time. You are needed most of all for yourself right now. Being there for other people more than you can be will just cause you more heartache and burden than necessary. Try, but do not compromise your mental health for anyone else’s benefit.
8. Stop wishing for that time machine. I’m sorry. There is no way to go back and fix what has happened. There is no way to change what has happened to you. You can only learn from it and move forward. Living in what ifs, is living in the past and hindsight is always 20/20. Terrible things happen for a reason, sometimes they lead us to the happiest moments of our lives. Remember that because it will stop you from forever living in the past.

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