1. You deserve to be comfortable where you live.
You shouldn’t feel displaced in your own home. You should never feel like you’re inconveniencing someone by being in your own space. Home should be a sanctuary, a safe space, a base for you to always be able to come back to. You are not a burden and you are not an inconvenience. If you feel like either in your home? Something’s gotta give. And that something is not you.
2. You deserve to hold people accountable.
You can’t expect much. But something that you should be able to expect from everyone? Honesty. Reliability. Accountability. People should be able to own their shit. You are allowed to hold people accountable. You are allowed to expect a certain level of honesty from other people. Remember: You deserve that much from others. It’s not actually that much to ask.
3. You deserve to be honest.
You shouldn’t have to hide the things that you feel. You shouldn’t find yourself continuously in situations where you feel like you have to bite your tongue. It is howevever, important to keep in mind that there is a difference between being honest and being unnecessary. But speaking your truth? Not having to constantly shrug things off because people can’t handle hearing it? That’s not something you should have to live with.
4. You deserve to walk away.
You are allowed to leave. You’re allowed to walk away, to let go, and to leave things behind. Pieces of yourself, included. You should never feel obligated to hold onto things simply because you used to, or someone expects it, or because you’ve been guilted into it. If you feel yourself leaning away, and wanting to walk away? You deserve to follow that path. Trust your gut—it has your best interests in mind.
5. You deserve to forgive yourself for the things you got wrong.
You are allowed to be human and to encompass all of what that means. The messiness, the imperfection, the ebbs and flows, the ups and downs. You don’t have to beat yourself up over and over and over again for the things you get wrong. Acknowledge them. Learn from them. And then forgive yourself and do better next time.
6. You deserve honesty.
Just as much as you deserve to BE honest, you deserve honesty in return. People shouldn’t have to sugarcoat their words to you or feel like they have to bend over backwards and exaggerate in order to get your attention. If you’re putting something out there that is inhibiting people from being able to be honest with you, you need to do some self-reflection and chalk that up to another mistake to learn from. Self-awareness is the most powerful tool you can arm yourself with.
7. You deserve to ask the tough questions, even when the person you’re asking is uncomfortable.
Even if they’re uncomfortable, even if you’re uncomfortable, even if/when the whole situation is stewing in uncomfortable. Asking the hard questions, the ones that come up with butterflies and nerves, is often the only way to get what you really want and need. You need to learn how to be comfortable in the uncomfortable. It’s the only way to move forward and best your best, most confident self.
8. You deserve to speak up when you feel wronged.
Brushing things under the rug is a temporary solution. Because those things we hide? Those things that we sweep to the side because “why get into it”? They have a funny way of popping their heads back up. They never stay dormant forever. So when someone’s hurt you, misled you, or done something that in any way made you feel bad? You’re allowed to say so. The only way to find resolution is to actually look for it.
9. You deserve your space.
No one should ever feel like they don’t have the ability to take a second, get away from it all, and just breathe. Similar to how you deserve to be comfortable in your own home, you deserve to be able to feel like you can get away. Everyone needs space. Everyone needs time. And taking advantage of such is not selfish, it’s incredibly healthy.
10. You deserve criticism.
Feedback is how we improve. Seeing where we have rough edges and shortcomings is how we smooth them out and become inspired to reach further to become better. No one should feel immune to criticism. While it is human nature to recoil from feedback that isn’t positive, we can all stand to learn how to take it. We can all stand to do better. Rejecting all criticism whatsoever isn’t a sign of confidence or self-assuredness. It’s a sign of stagnancy.
11. You deserve to grow.
And things that are stagnant, things that plateau, things that remain stuck in their ways, do not grow. You deserve to thrive and to blossom and to grow and become. And more than that? You deserve to never stop.