Take A Drink Anytime:

• Someone mentions Michael Phelps being a record holder.
• They talk about how they’ve “slashed the budget” for the opening ceremony/the Olympics in general in comparison to Beijing.
• There is a panoramic shot of the Christ the Redeemer statue.
• There’s talk about the Amazon rainforest or the environment. (Apparently the theme of this year is the environment…I didn’t know the Olympics had a theme other than sports…)
• A commentator is uncomfortable by the “sexy” nature of the opening ceremony. (This is reportedly the “sexiest” opening ceremony in Olympic history and is going to have lots of “scantily” clad dancers. My oh my.)
• There is a celebrity you do not recognize on screen. (Many Brazilian favorites are set to perform in the opening ceremony and will likely attend the games, but because we’re all trash we probably won’t recognize anyone.) 
• There is some sort of pyrotechnic or artistic way of forming the iconic Olympic rings, or there’s an emotional zoom in/out shot of them and the Olympic logo set to horns music.

Take Two Drinks When:

• Someone mentions the Zika virus. (Take an extra drink if they mispronounce it.)
• Someone shames Russia about the doping scandal.
• A commentator spends way too much time talking about a team’s uniform.
• There’s a close-up on an athlete’s family.
• Someone is caught awkward dancing off-beat by a camera.
• There’s mention of the five new sports that will hit the Olympic games in 2020.
• A comparison to the Olympics today vs. the Olympics in ancient Greece is made.
• You hear about an Olympic sport you didn’t know existed. (Looking at you, Olympic Table Tennis. Looking. At. You.)

Finish Your Drink When:

• The Olympic torch is lit/shown in a panoramic shot.
• Someone’s crying. (Unless a national anthem is being played – that’s fair game for tears.)
• A retired athlete is mentioned at an inappropriate time.
• The crowd starts chanting, “USA! USA!”
• You see or hear someone talk about Giselle Bundchen.