16 Guys On The Surprisingly Pathetic Reason They’ve Broken Up With Someone
"I was a little shit and I wish I could go back in time and punch myself in the dick."
1. “When I was in high school I legit dumped a girl once because she started wearing her hair up more often, and I liked it better down. I was a little shit and I wish I could go back in time and punch myself in the dick.” — Cameron, 26
2. “She was a bad kisser. And I’m not talking just like we had different ‘styles’ or anything like that. It felt like she was trying to eat my face. No bueno.” — Kyle, 27
3. “She chewed with her mouth open. I’m actually gagging thinking about it again.” — Dave, 31
4. “He was one of those ‘conspiracy theorists’ who would listen to Alex Jones all the time, freak out about chem trails and put sticky notes over his laptop’s camera so no one could secretly watch him. It just got to be a lot. And by a lot I mean a lot of crazy.” — Tom, 25
5. “She spilled Mike’s Hard Lemonade all over my laptop. I snapped and ended it. Partially because she could’ve destroyed my computer, and partially because she drank Mike’s Hard Lemonade.” — Kenneth, 24
6. “She just had a really annoying yawn. I couldn’t stand hearing it every morning. It wasn’t cute, it was irritating.” — Zayn, 22
7. “She had the WORST music ADD of anyone I’d ever met. So she’d be fucking flipping through the radio stations or whatever streaming service 30 seconds into each song. It was awful.” — Ben, 26
8. “Right when I got to college I started seeing a girl in one of my classes. But her dorm was all the way across campus and I got really tired of making the trek…so I ended it. No, I’m not proud.” — Travis, 24
9. “I’ll just say it. There was no other reason other than she was taller than me. And I was a little bitch and couldn’t take it.” — Riker, 27
10. “He was a baby talker. It wasn’t endearing, it was obnoxious. Hearing someone baby talk while we’re out at a 4 star restaurant? Mortifying. Absolutely mortifying.” — Christopher, 29
11. “She was a blabber mouth. And I could get over it with pretending to listen while she gossiped about her friends, or her mom, or whatever. But when she started spoiling the endings of movies and Game of Thrones? I was out.” — Matty, 27
12. “She had a super, SUPER sensitive gag reflex. It didn’t just make sex awkward (you do the math) but she would gag when eating, drinking coffee, sometimes I’d catch her making herself gag on accident just because she swallowed wrong. It was uncomfortable and grossed me out to be totally honest.” — Evan, 25
13. “We just had very, very different opinions about personal style. Example, he thought fedoras were a good look while I am an actual functioning member of society.” — Braydon, 26
14. “Once she farted when we were having sex. I played it off at the time but I honestly never got over it. I couldn’t take her seriously after that. I know, I know. I’m an asshole. Sue me.” — Paul, 23
15. “She was using my phone to take pictures of some fucking sunset and dropped it into the goddamn ocean. And she didn’t offer to help replace it! Are you kidding me!? I’m still mad about it.” — Chase, 26
16. “She had those toes where the second toe is longer than her big toe. And I know it’s stupid and weird but it really freaked me out! I couldn’t help but stare whenever she would wear sandals. So I did us both a favor and bounced.” Owen, 25 