Toddler Jokes

120+ Funny Toddler Jokes for Young Children (LOL)

Laughing with your kids is the best way to bond with them. They’re smarter than you think! You can tell them food, animal, or plant jokes that will make them laugh aloud. Here are a few toddler jokes you should share:

Funny Jokes For Kids

smiling woman standing beside sunflowers
Unsplash / Brooke Cagle

Make sure you share these hilarious jokes with kids. Here are some funny jokes for kids:

What did the limestone say to the geologist?

Don’t take me for granite!

Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize?

He was outstanding in his field!

What do you call a duck that gets all A’s?

A wise quacker.

What did one wall say to the other wall?

I’ll meet you at the corner!

Why does a seagull fly over the sea?

Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.

Who is Peppa Pig’s favorite painter?


How do piglets greet their grandparents?

With hogs and kisses.

What did the big flower say to the little flower?

Hi, bud!

What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?

I scream!

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing. They fast!

What do pirates pay for corn?

A buck an ear!

Why did the police play baseball?

He wanted to get a catch!

What did the microwave say to the other microwave?

Is it just me? Or is it really hot in here?

Why did the student eat his homework?

Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!

When you look for something, why is it always in the last place you look?

Because when you find it, you stop looking.

What is brown, hairy, and wears sunglasses?

A coconut on vacation.

What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?


What does the cow do for fun?

It goes to the moooo-vies.

What’s a train with a cold?

A-choo-choo train!

Why did the tomato blush?

Because it saw the salad dressing!

Silly Toddler Jokes To Share With Your Kid

woman wearing orange shirt and beige coat wearing sunglasses while standing near graffiti wall smiling
Unsplash / Cameron Sanborn

It doesn’t matter whether you have a three-year-old or a five-year-old. Either way, they’re old enough to laugh with you!

What did the duck say after she bought chapstick?

Put it on my bill!

What do you call a sad strawberry?

A blueberry.

Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

She’ll “Let It Go.”

Why couldn’t the pony sing “Happy Birthday?”

Because she was just a little hoarse!

Why do bicycles fall over?

Because they’re two-tired!

Why didn’t the duck pay for the chapstick?

He wanted to put it on his bill.

Why did Darth Vader turn off one light?

He prefers it on the dark side.

What do you call a fly without wings?

A walk.

Why was six afraid of seven?

Because seven eight nine!

Funny Jokes For Everyone In The Family

Here are some more hilarious jokes for kids to share!

Why does the banana need medication?

It isn’t peeling well!

Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other?

Dill with it.

What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?

That hit the spot!

What kind of room doesn’t have doors?

A mushroom!

Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?


Why do vampires seem sick all the time?

Because they’re always coffin!

What does one volcano say to the other?

“I lava you!”

Why do we never tell jokes about pizza?

They’re too cheesy.

What do you give a sick lemon?


Toddler Jokes To Tell Students At School

Unsplash / Javier Martínez

Here are some hilarious jokes that children are going to understand. But adults will appreciate them too!

Why did an old man fall in a well?

Because he couldn’t see that well!

Why is the clock banned from the library?

Because it tocks too much!

What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish?

You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish!

What type of tree fits in your hand?

A palm tree!

Why are peppers the best at archery?

Because they habanero!

Where do polar bears keep their money?

In a snow bank!

How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it!

Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?

Because she’s always running away from the ball!

Why are fish so smart?

Because they live in schools!

What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?

Hot cross bunnies.

Hilarious Jokes For Kids And Adults

woman smiling near tree outdoor during daytime
Unsplash / Jamie Brown

Here are some jokes for kids you’ve never heard before!

What does a cow do for fun?

Goes to the mooo-vies.

Why are elevator jokes so good?

They work on many levels!

What animal can you always find at a baseball game?

A bat!

Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his treasure?

Because he was a little shellfish!

Where do you learn to make ice cream?

Sundae school.

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

What did one snowman say to the other snowman?

It smells like carrots over here!

Why did the superhero flush the toilet?

Because it was his doody.

Fun Toddler Jokes Kids Will Love

woman in black tank top smiling
Unsplash / Linas Drulia

You’ll have a good laugh later if you tell your family members these funny toddler jokes for kids!

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

It was feeling crumby.

How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.

What did the tree say to the wind?

“Leaf me alone!”

What do you call an illegally parked frog?


What do you call a dancing cow?

A milkshake!

What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?


How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

What cheese is only mine?

Nacho cheese!

Why did the picture go to prison?

Because it was framed!

What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck!

More Funny Jokes For Kids

low-angle photography of two men playing beside two women
Unsplash / Felix Rostig

Here are a few more jokes that will make any kid laugh out loud!

What is brown and sticky?

A stick!

What’s the difference between zebras and bananas?

Bananas are yellow!

Why did the boy cross the street?

Because the cow said MOOOOOOOOOOOO.

What is a booger’s favorite song?

The Motown Boogie.

What did one firefly say to the other?

“You glow, girl!”

What do you call a donkey with three legs?

A wonkey.

What’s the difference between elephants and bananas?

Bananas are yellow.

What is fast, loud, and crunchy?

A rocket chip!

What do you call an ant who fights crime?

A vigilante!

Where does a queen keep her armies?

Up her sleevies.

Hilarious Toddler Jokes 

photo of woman beside another woman at seashore
Unsplash / Thought Catalog

These toddler jokes for kids are going to cause you to break into laughter. They’re funny, no matter what your age!

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding half a worm in your apple!

What do you call a rooster staring at a pile of lettuce?

A chicken sees a salad.

How do you throw a party on Mars?

You planet.

How do you keep a bull from charging?

Take away its credit card!

What did the traffic light say to the car?

Look away, I’m about to change!

Why did the boy throw a stick of butter out the window?

Because he wanted to see a butterfly!

What did one eye say to the other eye?

Between us, something smells!

Why did the pony get sent to his room?

He wouldn’t stop horsing around!

What did the policeman say to his tummy?

“You’re under a vest!”

Silly Toddler Jokes For Kids

2 women smiling and standing near trees during daytime
Unsplash / Omar Lopez

If you need a few more jokes, look no further!

Why are pirates called pirates?

They just ARRRRRRR.

How do you make an octopus laugh?

With ten-tickles!

Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?

Because she was stuffed.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!

What has ears but can’t hear?

A cornfield.

What did the science book say to the math book?

“Wow, you’ve got problems!”

Why do giraffes have such long necks?

Because they have smelly feet.

How does a vampire start a letter?

Tomb it may concern…

What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?

R2 detour.

Toddler Jokes Even Adults Will Love

woman in white crew neck t-shirt covering her face with her hand
Unsplash / Mathilde Langevin

Tell these toddler jokes to your child, cousin, or sibling today. They’ll think you’re the most hilarious person in the family!

How do you stop an astronaut’s baby from crying?

You rocket!

Why are ghosts bad liars?

Because you can see right through them!

What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?


What did the paper say to the pencil?

Write on!

When does a joke become a “dad” joke?

When the punchline is a parent.

How do you make a lemon drop?

Just let it fall.

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta!

What did the banana say to the dog?

Bananas can’t talk.

 Why did the kid throw his clock out the window?

Because he wanted to see time fly!

Why did the banana go to the doctor?

Because he wasn’t “peeling” well!

What does a ghost like to eat for dinner?


Knock Knock Jokes For Children

woman standing at forest while smiling
Unsplash / Brooke Cagle

You won’t be able to stop laughing when you tell these silly toddler jokes!

  1. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Justin. Justin who? Justin time for breakfast!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boo! Boo who? Oh no, don’t cry!
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Banana! Banana who? Knock, knock. Who’s there? Banana! Banana who? Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh— MOOO!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Icy. Icy who? Icy you in there!
  6. Why was the broom late? It over-swept!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it’s cold out here!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!
  10. Knock knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Ah, don’t cry, Halloween is just around the corner!
  11. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Annie. Annie who? Annie body home?
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Isabel. Isabel who? Isabel not working?
  13. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Hatch. Hatch who? Bless you!
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, silly head! Cows go moo!
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Interrupting pirate! Interup… AAAAAR!
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dozen. Dozen who? Dozen anyone want to let me in?

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.