When you’re heartbroken, you might make some impulsive decisions you regret later. But, really, you shouldn’t regret doing whatever it takes to heal. You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.
Here are a few things you might consider mistakes that actually aren’t as bad as they seem:
1. Rebounding. No, you shouldn’t lead someone else on and hurt them in the same way you were hurt, but there’s no harm in hooking up with someone who is on the same page as you. Don’t feel guilty about needing another body on top of yours. Don’t feel actual shame on your walk of shame. Hooking up with someone new might not help you get over your ex, but if it helps you forget about them for a little while and you have a good time, what’s the harm? It’s a good reminder that your ex isn’t the only person interested. They aren’t the only one who sees the good in you.
2. Crying your eyes out. You’re allowed to be upset over losing someone — even if that person was an asshole. Even if you weren’t in a serious relationship. Even if you knew they weren’t going to stick around forever. It’s dangerous to bottle up your emotions, so you should let yourself cry. Don’t feel silly over your tears because it’s natural to be upset when you lose someone. It’s perfectly normal to need a release.
3. Texting your ex. You don’t want to text them if you can help it, but if the damage is already done, you shouldn’t feel embarrassed. Maybe you wanted answers. Maybe you wanted to vent. Or maybe you wanted to get back together with them. No matter what your reason was for texting them, it’s okay that you reached out. It’s okay that you’re having trouble coping without them. Your life is different without them in it. It’s going to take some time to adjust.
4. Posting your drama on social media. Although you probably don’t want the whole world to know you’re heartbroken, everyone on social media would’ve realized your relationship status changed anyway. They would’ve seen your new profile picture. It’s hard to keep your relationship private in this day and age. And honestly, no one else is judging you as much as you’re judging yourself. Everyone has been in a similar situation before. If anything, the people who have read your sad — or angry — posts are probably more concerned for you than annoyed by you.
5. Spending hours ranting to your friends and family. Your loved ones want to be there for you. They want to help you endure your heartache. Although you might wish you kept your venting to yourself after your anger dies down, you have to remember there’s nothing wrong with reaching out to others when you need help. You shouldn’t be going through this alone. Your friends and family can help you with your healing process. Simply knowing they are there for you can be a big comfort.
6. Blocking your ex on social media. Even though you don’t want to come across as petty, blocking your ex is actually a good idea. It can help you get over them. It’s good to get them off your mind. It’s good to give yourself some distance from them.