Poop Jokes

30 Explosively Funny Poop Jokes

These poop jokes prove that humor can be clean and dirty at the same time

Poop jokes are not just for children. Even if you’re a full-grown adult, you are still going to end up laughing your ass off.

1. Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary?

It runs in your genes.

2. I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday.

Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever.

3. Have you seen the movie Diarrhea?

It leaked so they had to release it early.

4. Did you hear about the constipated accountant?

He couldn’t budget.

5. You never really appreciate what you’ve got until it’s gone.

Toilet paper is a good example.

6. Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

He worked it out with a pencil.

7. What’s brown and sounds like a bell?


8. What did one fly say to the other?

Is this stool taken?

9. What’s big and brown and behind the wall?

Humpty’s Dump.

10. Do you want to hear a poop joke?

Never mind it’s too corny.

11. What do you call Clark Kent with diarrhea?


12.“Waiter, what’s this fly doing in my soup?”


13. What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?

Salad Shooter.

14. What’s brown and firm?

The Brown Family Law Firm.

15. What do you call a magical poop?


16. What did the poo say to the fart?

You blow me away.

17. When does Denzel Washington have to hang out with the Rugrats?

Potty Training Day.

18. What’s brown and rhymes with Snoop?

Dr. Dre.

19. What’s the true definition of bravery?

Chancing a fart when you know you have diarrhea.

20. What do you get when you poop in your overalls?


21. Children are like farts.

Your own are just about bearable, but everyone else’s are horrendous.

22. Have you seen that new movie Constipated?

It hasn’t come out yet.

23. People say love is the best feeling ever.

But I think finding a toilet when you’re having diarrhea is better.

24. Did you know that when you say the word “poop”, your mouth does the same motion as your bum hole?

The same is true for the phrase, “explosive diarrhea”.

25. Did you hear about the constipated composer?

He had problems with his last movement.

26. Poop jokes aren’t my favorite jokes.

But they’re a solid #2.

27. How do you get the bathroom unlocked in a hurry?

With a doo-key.

28. If pooping is a call of nature.

Then is farting a missed call?

29. My love for you is like diarrhea.

I can’t hold it in.

30. Why don’t girls poop?

They can’t keep their mouths shut long enough to build pressure! Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

January Nelson

January Nelson

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.