1. You stop performing basic rituals. You don’t see much of a point in washing your hair or doing your makeup or inserting your contacts. It’s not like anyone is going to judge you, because no one is going to see you. You have no one else to impress, and honestly, you don’t care enough about yourself to take care of yourself for yourself.
2. You think too much. Since you haven’t been socializing much, your mind starts wandering. You start wondering whether your friends and family even care about you since they haven’t checked in on you. They haven’t realized you’ve been isolating yourself, they haven’t realized you’ve gone MIA, they haven’t realized anything is wrong. Of course, there’s no way for them to tell something has been wrong because you’ve shut them out. You haven’t let them know what’s been going on with you.
3. You become restless. Even if you usually hate leaving your house, being cooped up for too long will make you desperate for human interaction. It will make you want to venture outside, travel the world, meet new people. It will give you a craving for adventure.
4. But you also become lazy. Even though you’re tempted to leave the house, you’ll keep yourself locked inside. The more time you spend alone, the harder it is to conjure up the energy to insert yourself back into the world. It’s easier to keep doing what you’re doing. You stay stuck in a self-destructive cycle you aren’t sure how to break, even though you’re clearly unhappy.
5. You come up with lame excuses to keep doing what you’re doing. If someone asks you to hang out with them, you’ll lie about how you already have plans. If someone asks you how you spent your weekend, you’ll lie about the exciting things you’ve done. You don’t want to sound pathetic by admitting you haven’t left your bed in weeks. You don’t want anyone to judge you over your sadness.
6. Your jealousy hits an all-time high. You experience a lot of FOMO when you’re scrolling through social media from beneath your blankets. You won’t only be jealous of people who are out having a good time. You’ll be jealous of anyone who has enough energy to post a selfie, to post an update, to put themselves out there in any way at all.
7. You wonder whether something is wrong with you. You wonder why it’s so hard for you to get dressed and leave the house. You wonder why it’s so hard for you to socialize, to be productive, to live a normal life. You wonder whether you’re screwed up somehow, whether there is something about you that’s broken. You wonder whether things are ever going to change.
8. You realize you have to take action. You need to go to therapy. You need to reach out to loved ones. You need to get out in the sun. You need to do something, anything, differently than what you’ve been doing because you’ve been miserable. You know you can’t keep isolating yourself. You can’t keep hiding away and expecting your mood to magically change. You have to take action. You have to start caring more about yourself and taking better care of yourself.