Every Useful Thing Heartbreak Has Ever Taught Me

Every Useful Thing Heartbreak Has Ever Taught Me

1. Feelings don’t last forever.

Anything can feel like forever in a moment. That goes for infatuation, love, anger, resentment, all of it. But moments don’t last forever, and neither do the feelings associated with them. So love hard while you can. When the anger of a heartbreak finally subsides, appreciate that you made it out to the other side.

2. Relying on the unreliable will teach you really fast how to rely on yourself better.

Whether you relied on them emotionally, financially, or for day-to-day things – once it’s over you truly learn how to rely on yourself. You learn that the worst kind of person isn’t an evil one, it’s an inconsistent one.

3. If you can’t get your own jars open, turn them upside down and tap it with a butter knife.

You know, just in case that was something you relied on them for.

4. If they seem practiced in how they charm you, it’s because they are.

Awkward is the way to go. Charmers are so good at drawing you in because they do it to everyone. A liar can do romantic gestures like writing love notes and knowing exactly what to say. It doesn’t make them less of a liar. 

5. How to be alone.

Not alone like by yourself, but alone like when you feel so empty and you can’t think of one person to talk to. When the pain is pulsing through you and not even your favorite movie or song can distract you from it. When you feel like you will never have anything so meaningful ever again because this was it. This is because the person who hurt you is probably the person you were used to comforting you. This is a new level of loneliness. But once it’s felt, any connection is that much more appreciated, and you learn how to comfort yourself better each time.

6. It doesn’t have to be a romantic heartbreak to hurt like hell.

Breaking up with a city, a friend, a job, a phase of life, it all hurts in its own way.

7. Different kinds of heartbreak inspire different styles of art.

Some feels like acceptance, some anger, some pure sadness, some relief. Making art from emotion is the greatest form of art to be made. It’s relatable and effective and the world needs it.

8. Once you’ve been in a truly toxic manipulative relationship, you can smell a phony from a mile away.

Believe actions, not promises. If someone has to promise you time and time again that they will change or do things differently, don’t believe them. Believe them only when they actually follow through.

9. You’ll be okay.

Once you get through heartbreak, you can get through anything. Losing something that brought you joy can be one of the most gutting things to go through. Unfortunately, no one is awarded an easy life, and no one is immune from heartbreak. This isn’t something to be sad about. This is something that unifies the human experience. This is a big part of the human experience.

About the author

Erin Cinney

Let go or be dragged.