9. It’s like a “fight” alarm

My wife is a nurse, not in Labor and Delivery though.

In her hospital, I’m sure in others too, when a baby is born a sound goes off throughout the entire hospital. A chime or something. All the women go “aaaawwwww.”

She says on very rare occasions you will hear that chime and within 5-10 minutes after you here over the intercom a call for a code yellow(or whatever color it is) in Labor and Delivery.

That means a fight is occurring or some type of physical rampage and for any well built male to come help with the situation.

Maybe a coincidence. But probably not.

10. Military infidelity is rampant

Working with military medicine will show you the wonderful world of infidelity. One mother delivered her child a few months AFTER her husband returned from a 9 month deployment. The gentleman stood outside the room and waited until the delivery was finished so he could sign the paperwork. Oddly enough, under “Father” he signed it as “Unknown” and left. Over the next few hours 4 or 5 other Marines came up to pay her a visit. That was a really awkward night in the hospital.

11. Unwed mothers in Ohio

Not a nurse, I’m a phlebotomist, but we’ve had more cases of unwed women not letting their S/O sign the birth certificate even if he was the biological father. The men react poorly, obviously. And make a scene in the hospital. The OB ward here has extra security because people are famous for taking babies too.

Before anyone asks: Ohio.

Also, for some reason, newborns are posted online for most hospitals along with their full name. I urge some of you to Google your nearest hospital and look at the ridiculous names people give their kids.