You are going to have days when being alive feels daunting and isolating. Days when waking up feels painful, and when facing the world seems like a chore. These are the days when you will hit the snooze button over and over again, the days when you will sink deep down under your comforter and surround yourself with a blanket of darkness and warmth. These are the days when your body will tell you to stay in bed and when your heart will beat rapidly as if to warn you that it is not safe to be alive today.
You may feel like something is missing, like you have been hollowed out. You may feel broken and unfinished, as if a crucial piece of your heart or your mind is missing. You may feel homesick, even in your own home and body, and you may feel lonely, despite the fact that you have plenty of friends and loved ones. Your mind may feel exhausted, and your soul may be tired… too tired to face the world.
I’m not here to tell you to keep your chin up or that everything will be better if you just get a good night of sleep. I’m not going to tell you that the world is always a warm and cozy place or that pretty soon you will fall back in love with being alive. I’m not even going to tell you to have a good day. Because the truth is, it’s not a good day. Your heart isn’t in it and your thoughts are too low. It’s a heavy day. And it’s okay to acknowledge this.
What I am here to tell you is that it’s okay to feel emotionally drained and hurt. It’s okay to feel empty and down, lonely and discouraged. I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to cry and to break down and to feel every single hard feeling today. It’s okay to sink into the pain rather than trying to ride the waves. It’s okay if you can’t move mountains today or tomorrow or even the next day. it’s okay if all you do today is sit with your feelings and breathe. Because maybe today isn’t about feeling better. Maybe today is just about surviving.
I’m also here to tell you that despite how broken you feel and despite how hard it is to be in the world today, you are not going to feel this way forever. I know this because nothing ever lasts forever. The pendulum always swings back and forth. Feelings and emotions come and go. Hard times eventually break and the sun always pushes through the clouds once again.
So while you are in the dark, I am here to tell you that you are brave, and that you are going to make it through. I am here to reassure you that in time, things will get better. I can’t promise you that tomorrow will feel better than today. But I can tell you that life does get better, and that life will not fail you. I can promise you that one day, you won’t be so afraid. One day, you won’t feel so alone. Because you are brave and strong, and you are never alone.
So instead of telling you to cheer up, I’m here to tell you that you can do this. You can feel sad and bad and down and still make it through. You can experience heartbreak and still heal. You have the strength inside of you to make it through these days. You have the courageous heart of a lion and the kind soul of a lamb. So hold on and focus on surviving. Please sit through the storms. Please do whatever you need to make it out on the other side. Because I promise, you absolutely will.