We obsess over why relationships don’t work out, dissecting every detail, past, present, and fantasy. We come to a variety of conclusions that blame anything but ourselves, hoping to lessen the sting of debilitating disappointment.

When your focus clears and you start to wonder why your efforts didn’t change the outcome, ask yourself, Was your input matched?

Not everyone will fight for you; in fact, most won’t. With the casualty of the current relationship status quo, we can make the mistake of overthinking ourselves out of rejection.

A person can make contact and make fun without putting in the work that enables a fighting chance of a relationship lasting.

Relationships are hard enough when both people are making an honest effort. You don’t stand a chance when only half of the relationship is trying.

It feels easier to blame until we rationalize things ending or never beginning.

We use timing to justify rejection. We blame people outside of the relationship instead of faulting the people inside.

We do anything to distract us from reality, wishing that we could travel to another time and place.

If they didn’t put in the work, you have your answer. If they didn’t meet you halfway, you were never going to be close enough.

If they didn’t invest the time to learn about you, they were never really interested.

Don’t love someone who doesn’t love you back.

Don’t ever wonder if someone loves you, because if they did, I promise you would know.

I know it doesn’t feel like a choice, but at some point it is.

Maybe they put in the work at some point, but when that stops, you need to put the work into taking care of yourself.

When someone stops trying in a relationship, it doesn’t mean you need to work twice as hard.

Instead, work twice as smart.

Take care of yourself today and you’ll thank yourself tomorrow.