250 People Reveal The Lesson They Learned After A Failed Relationship

We asked, and you guys answered! Below are the best responses.

61.
“Someone who truly loves you would never leave you to deal with depression on your own after they get knowledge of it. And most definitely won’t do it over Whatsapp and while on a business trip to Sweden, especially if it has been 10 years. And then come back when they see you’re finally doing better and are ready to move on to better things/people.”

62.
“Make sure that you are not the only one who has anything to contribute to the divorce. Because the useless, disrespectful, entitled half will take it all and still ask, ‘Where’s the rest of it?’ So make sure you tell them to get off of their ass, work harder, save money, start a retirement account, and don’t blow $30,000 out of our business account on non-business-related purchases and then blame others.”

63.
“I learned that no matter how long you’ve been together…or how many times you’ve given forgiveness…or countless time where you chose the love you have over other things that can be a great opportunity for you…they will still LEAVE YOU…the painful thing was when they just left you without answers on why…I realized that they are not as all out for you as you are to them…and that they only think of themselves rather than you or the things that could hurt you…The more you forgive…the more you get hurt…but you will always reach the end point… when you reach that? Stop. Move on. Cry if you need to…but then when you’re done…Focus on what matters…be brave and learn to love and take care of yourself more…Pray for GOD’s love and guidance…”

64.
“Don’t miss out on something good just because it’s different than what you planned. Sometimes, it’s okay to change your dreams and take a chance. And sometimes, love just isn’t enough. But if you are lucky, when one door closes, whether on purpose or accidentally, another will open.”

65.
“Never regret what happened with you and your ex; things happen for a reason, Don’t get mad with your ex, forgive him and forgive yourself as well, learn to accept the fact that it is over, remind yourself that there’s always better to come along, and surround yourself with positivity.”

66.
“We’ll meet that perfect person in our life but no matter how perfect they are sometimes they are just not perfect for us. At the end of the day, we should just be happy having to meet the person we used to love who also loved us, and accept the fact that relationships end because on the long way run we tend to say things we don’t mean and hurt the person we love and who loves us. You don’t talk to each other like that before but now you do.”

67.
“I won’t shed another tear for someone who can’t talk about what is going on. Relationships are work and rewarding when both put in the work…”

68.
“If they don’t accept you for who you are and help you become a better person instead of constantly criticizing you and judging you for your faults, then they do not truly love you. Love should happen through the good bad and ugly and if they bring you down instead of lifting you up then they ain’t worth it.”

69.
“To always listen to your intuitions and acknowledge your instincts! That ‘little voice’ that tells you some things that someone is doing and saying is toxic for you, should never be ignored because this voice you hear is your wake up call to finding yourself again!”

70.
“Don’t let yourself be pressured into a relationship you don’t want just because all your friends like that friend better, the person keeps crying about it, and everyone is saying ‘you should give them a chance.'”

71.
“Don’t stay for a one-time high if they’ve given you an all-time low. You can’t be the only one giving 100% all the time while they give you 100% once in a blue moon.”

72.
“People are fickle and treat partners like disposable objects now with so much social media & too many choices…a simple disagreement and it’s just too easy to swipe right /left or whatever to find another. Sad world.”

73.
“Don’t ignore your own feelings. If you think that the relationship you are in is wrong, then it is. Never settle for words, always pay attention to how they treat you. And don’t forget to not get lost; make sure you know your way back.”

74.
“- Never sacrifice self-respect. If someone no longer respects you and is talking down to you, be brave enough to walk away.”
– You can be angry, but never say something that will hurt her feelings. It may remain on her mind forever.
– Be strong and continue living up to your dreams. Your happiness and decisions in life shouldn’t depend on someone.
– Give yourself time to heal.
– When you’re done moving on, don’t be afraid to love again with the things you’ve learned from the past. You sure are a better person now.
– Love fiercely. As long as you’re happy, don’t be afraid to take risks. Love without regrets.”

75.
“That every ‘I love you’ doesn’t come from the heart, but its just to please the other party.”

Thought Catalog

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Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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