A Case For The Grey Area

I wish you could see how special you truly are. Instead, you’re focused on what could have been and sad about what will no longer be.

I wish you could see the light that radiates every time you enter a room. Instead, you’re locked away in-between those four walls wishing things didn’t play out the way they did.

I wish you could see how brave you are for leaving where you grew up for a chance at a better future. Instead, you’re fearful that “the one” is getting away.

I wish you could see how strong you are for getting out of bed when all you want to do is hide under the sheets. Instead, you’re giving yourself a hard time for feeling what you feel.

I wish you could see how admirable it was of you to open up and allow yourself to be vulnerable with them, give them the benefit of the doubt. Instead, you’re angry you trusted and believed their words.

I wish you could see past the pain they inflicted on you when they did the things that hurt you, the things that caused you to feel like you’ve been broken. The things that feel so heavy on your chest right now.

I wish you could see that better days are coming. That this hurt will pass. All you have to do is allow yourself the time and space to feel and heal.

I wish you could see that things ending, doesn’t define who you are.

You are so much more than those plans you made with them. You are so much more than the idea that isn’t happening anymore. You are so much more than who you thought you were with them.

I wish you could see past all of this hurt. Past the tears. Heartache. Sleepless nights.

I wish you could see what a kind and caring soul you are. I wish you could see how much YOU are. Just YOU. Without them.

And maybe you might not see it now. Maybe going back is what you need right now. Maybe you need for things to get to the point of no return before you truly can walk away. And that’s okay.

Because sometimes being in the gray area is where you grow the most. It’s where you begin to understand yourself. It’s where the most life-changing changes happen.

And maybe being there is just enough. And I want you to know that that is okay too. And maybe dealing with everything you know is inevitable is not what you need at this moment. And that is okay too.

Know that sometimes all the green juices aren’t enough. Sometimes all the self-help books aren’t enough. Sometimes working out is not enough. Sometimes all the yoga isn’t enough. Sometimes all you need is to be. Until you no longer can. Until you finally need to do something about it. Until you’ve exhausted your time there.

And that is okay too.