I Like Your Flaws

I like how you mispronounce words sometimes, how you fumble and stammer and stutter looking for the right ones to say and the right ways to say them. I appreciate that you find language challenging, because it is, because everything manmade is challenging. Including man, including you.

When you sleep on your side, I like to map the constellations between your beauty marks freckles pimples, the minuscule mountains that sprinkle your back. I like the tufts of hair you forgot to shave and the way you smell when you haven’t showered in a while; I like the sleep left in your eyes.

I like the way your skin dies in the middle of the night, how you die from embarrassment the next morning; how you writhe in the snake casing you’ve left behind. I like that you think pillow snowflakes carry more weight than pillow talk; that you think my opinion of you is so fickle that it could change overnight. (It’s not.)

I enjoy seeing you insecure, vulnerable. I like to watch red steam light up your cheeks, a spreading mist of shame when you think you’ve done something unacceptable like missing a step on the stairs or not having the perfect answer to something I’ve said. It’s like you honestly don’t know how wonderful you are, it’s like you have no idea.

The burns, the scars, the black and blues on your face body heart, I want to know their stories. I want to know what hurt you, who hurt you, how bad the damage is. I like your hard, ugly toenails and the layer of fat that lines your belly, the soft parts you try to hide. It’s okay to be soft, sometimes.

I appreciate your ability to get inappropriately angry as much as I appreciate your willingness to apologize afterward. I like how your passion manifests unpredictably and uncontrollably, how your feelings cannot be caged or concealed, how you’re incapable of apathy.

I like how you can’t dance, how you have pedestrian taste in music, how the worst song on every album is your favorite. I like how enthusiastic you are when you hear it, it’s like you don’t know how terrible it is, it’s like maybe how you’re able to love someone like me. (Perhaps that’s your biggest flaw, perhaps that’s the one I love most.)

Your flaws single you out, set you apart, make you different from the rest, and thank god. I don’t just put up with settle for accept your blemishes, I like them. I like them because they make you human, and humans are easier to love than photographs and illusions and ideals; humans fit more easily between arms and between legs; humans are welcome to their imperfections because if there’s one thing humans can do perfectly, it’s love. Humans can love, they can do it flawlessly. TC mark

image – Anthony Easton


More From Thought Catalog

  • http://twitter.com/notjohnlee Mark

    how is you constantly raise your own bar? LOVE this

  • cogitoergosum

    fuckin’ good, this one is.

  • http://scribblesandtostitos.wordpress.com Yaa Yaa

    This is beautiful.

  • http://itsrainin9.com Geraldine


  • Jessica

    This is perfection.

  • Kaitlynclement

    “It’s like you honestly don’t know how wonderful you are, it’s like you have no idea”my FAVORITE line <3

    • http://twitter.com/laundryandri Andri Alexandrou


      • kaylee

        Truth that it’s her favorite line? Yeah, probably.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_5WQXSSKAMOU4WCHKCWYMUKKKNU Aladin Sane

    Baby, the way you pick your nose when you get nervous, turns my heart to jelly

  • Rishtopher

    “I like them because they make you human, and humans are easier to love than photographs and illusions and ideals”

    Truth (and also why I can’t find celebrities attractive).

  • Sophia

    ohhhh, all of this. All of it. I can’t even pick a favorite line. I love it all.

  • http://www.facebook.com/grc15r Gregory Costa

    How do you feel about stretch marks and broken capillaries? Because I’ve got plenty of those to love.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

    embrace me

  • Daniel

    This should be a Stevie Wonder song

  • Anon

    I found it okay.. you could’ve written a better piece on this topic. Could bring out more emotions.

    • http://twitter.com/laundryandri Andri Alexandrou

      sarcasm, right?

    • Anonymous

      Who are you to say how her feelings should manifest in writing? Some single, caustically bitter human?

      This is perfect because it’s her EXACT feelings. It’s also probably flawed and that makes it beautiful.

      SHUT UP!!

      Stephanie you’re an artist!

      • Internetstrangeronemillion

        uhhh chill the fuck out? Anon is right, this is an old topic and this article doesn’t dredge any new material from it

      • beatrice

        Is there ever anything new on thought catalog?

  • Nikijoy

    this was next to flawless.

  • Jesus

    My main flaw is Thought Catalog makes me want to stab myself with an ice pick. Date next Friday?

  • Nohora Galan

    :( ahora me siento triste … ♥

  • http://www.facebook.com/julianajaeger Juliana Jaeger

    tl;dr version: “I like that your shame and embarrassment and compromised physical
    appearance afford me such superiority over you as to label your features
    as flaws. I want to know precisely what hurts you so I can continue to
    keep you right where I’ve got you: beneath me.” I haven’t read something this abysmally condescending in ages.  Author sounds like a garden-variety sociopath.

    • beatrice

      haha the underlying subtext of the article

    • Meaghan H.

      not sure the writer is the sociopath here, hon =/

    • bitchy

      haha wow I didn’t read it that way at all the first time, but reading it again, through the lens you’ve provided, I can totally see that scenario. Nice perceptive reading! I’d like to think it can be both ways, but the more I consider what you’ve said, the more I wonder if reveling in someone’s “flaws” can really only lead to your conclusion, a kind of pitying affection.

    • lover of flaws

      Love isn’t purely worship of assets. No human is flawless and thus a great part of love is finding endearment in tiny imperfections. It truly saddens me to find that there are people out there that wish to quell a persons blemishes rather than loving them fully and shamelessly. I pity you. 

    • Afsdfs

      So glad someone else saw what I saw in this. There are parts that are sweet and true, but the overriding tone is one of condescension and powertripping. “I like seeing you miserable and believing yourself to be a piece of shit, instead of confident of your own value as a human being. Your painful shyness and lack of self-esteem is utterly adorable to me.”

  • Guestation


  • Trashytreasure

    “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.”

  • ax

    You are my favorite writer on thought catalog

  • beatrice

    I really liked this. Unfortunately, I always feel like a terrible person for liking the flaws

  • martin

    since “flaws” are based on pefection and no-one is “perfect” isnt it safe to say you like them for who they are?  (” i like the way one of your legs is shorter than the other so when you walk it looks like your trying to climb stairs…”)  or did i miss the point?

    • JMH

      I do think you missed the point in the minor, while getting it in the major.
      I think the subject wasn’t so much the author’s perception of flaws, as commenting on the silliness of the things the object is ashamed of in themselves. If that makes sense?

  • Anonymous

    like :)

  • guest

    This is possibly the sweetest thing I’ve ever read. :) It made me smile, one of those things that accentuates the beauties of this world. Thank you for writing it.

  • M.E.

    “It’s like you don’t know how terrible it is, it’s like maybe how you’re able to love someone like me. (Perhaps that’s your biggest flaw, perhaps that’s the one I love most.)”

    So much this.

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