A Seattle Couple’s Home Was Broken Into, And This Is What They Found Under The Bed

So today in incredibly bizarre news, a Seattle couple had their home broken into and, though almost nothing was taken, several strange and seemingly random things had been done to their belongings. According to the Seattle Police Blotter:

Someone—or something—had torn open their mail, spread clothing throughout the house, smeared lotion on a door handle, removed the inner soles from all of their shoes, screwed a single screw into a piece of scrap wood—which had been crammed into the space between a door and its frame—and placed an upside-down can of paint on top of their toilet. A purse, containing a 27-year-old woman’s ID card, had also mysteriously appeared on top of the couple’s bed.

The police arrived soon after their call and dusted for prints — it turns out 50 dollars had gone missing — but found nothing. Shortly after, the couple called police again because they heard noises, not unlike a “dying possum or raccoon, coming from under their bed.

When police arrived, they found a 27-year-old woman who weighed approximately 90 pounds, and “appeared to be having a panic attack” who had been holed up under the bed (where they also found a kitchen knife). Upon further inspection, police also discovered hypodermic needles in the bedsheets and a few locks of blonde hair scattered around the apartment.

The meth-addled 27-year-old has been dubbed “The Meth Banshee,” and she likely entered the home by climbing up a tree and coming through an open window. The “Meth Banshee” is currently in police custody.

W.T.F.