25 Struggles Of Being In Your Late 20s

1. No longer being allowed the “you’re young, it’s okay” excuse when it comes to buying Christmas gifts for all your extended family members.

2. Not wanting to just openly ask for money for Christmas and birthdays, but still definitely needing it.

3. Not knowing how to tell your friends, “It’s not that I don’t like you and don’t want to attend your wedding… I just don’t have enough money to go to South Carolina for a weekend and buy you a gift.”

4. Having enough sensibility to want to eat healthy, and following all of the “healthy foodie” blogs to inspire yourself, but not having the money for kale and flax seed and greek yogurt and all of the stuff you’re supposed to be eating. (So you just buy Wheat Thins and reduced-fat hummus and call it a day.)

5. Being expected to drink things like martinis and bellinis and white wine, but still wanting a rail vodka soda with a splash of cranberry.

6. Waking up in the morning and not having the energy to check Facebook because it’s like Russian Roulette with “Who is gonna be engaged and posting 500 photos of the engagement moment today?”

7. Not liking to talk about the year you graduated college because it’s… getting really far away.

8. Going to the same bar you used to go to all the time, and suddenly realizing that you are the oldest person in there.

9. Calling 22-year-olds at the bar “kids” without even knowing that you’re doing it.

10. Going from “I’m not leaving the dance floor until they are turning on the house lights” to “Eh, it’s 12:15, I’m tired. It’s been a long week.”

11. Having to hold your friends’ children and being afraid that you are going to drop or break it somehow.

12. Getting hangovers that last literally for the entire next day, and knowing that you can’t plan on doing anything if you drink more than three drinks the night before.

13. Suddenly realizing that “brunch” is the go-to activity for everyone you know, and — between the bloody marys, mimosas, and frittatas — it’s a pretty expensive activity.

14. Simultaneously wanting to wean yourself off coffee for the health benefits, and being more dependent on coffee than ever before.

15. No longer having patience for the relationships that are clearly bad for you, and getting exhausted at the thought of “seeing someone” for a month only to have it go nowhere.

16. Using online dating, and feeling really old when you check your age box.

17. Slowly realizing that you are the same age or older as a lot of the celebrities or fictional characters that you always assumed were way older than you.

18. Looking really lame when you don’t have things like a matching set of plates or extra sets of linens at your house, but not being put-together enough to actually go out and buy them.

19. Understanding that a Bed, Bath and Beyond gift card is worth its weight in gold.

20. Using a calendar (ugh).

21. Looking forward to your weekend mostly because it means that you can sleep for a solid fourteen hours and no one can say shit about it.

22. Not having the ability or proximity to make friends really easily, and often asking yourself “Is there an OKCupid for people who want to be friends? Can you pick up a friend in a bar? Can you go out on a first friend date?”

23. Slowly narrowing down your dating requirements from “tall, handsome, smart, funny, good job, nice family” to “still single and not insane.”

24. Hearing music that is popular with teenagers and honestly wondering how the world could have changed so much in the past few years. (What happened to Jimmy Eat World? Why isn’t that good enough for teenagers anymore? What is this Skrillex nonsense?)

25. Pretending that 30 isn’t coming, even though it definitely is. Just don’t look at the calendar and it can’t possibly happen… I promise…