Resolutions are tough. Great when you’re making them, but hard to keep to. Easy to break. And then comes the guilt. The feeling of failure. And with it, the reluctance to try again.

How about you make a list of everything you won’t do next year?

A list of anti-resolutions.

Next year…

I will not allow other people to dictate my life.

Not your career, your relationships, your appearance, or your beliefs. This is your life and next year, try living it for you. Who you’re going to be is still all to play for.

I will not base my worth on my relationship status.

Be still. Place your hand on your heart. This is where your worth begins and ends – with you. It doesn’t matter if you’re single, taken, or caught up in the most complicated of tangles – how you feel about yourself and what you believe you deserve lives within you.

I will not continue to do shit I hate.

Because life is too damn short to spend it in a shitty job that’s sucking your soul out, in a town that bores you senseless, or trying to rekindle the flame of a relationship that has long since burned out.

This year, stop doing things because you think you have to, because others guilt you into them, because they’re comfortable and you’re scared of the unknown. Start the new year with a shit-you-hate detox.

I will not keep company with people who dull my sparkle.

You know the ones I’m talking about. Those who deal in idle gossip, Chinese whispers, and negativity. Those who complain all day about their circumstances, but won’t do a thing to change them. Those who say one thing to your face, and another behind your back. Those who take without giving, and are never truly there for you when you need them most. Those who want to know you while you’re down, but drop you the moment you decide to step up.

Let this be the year you part ways.

I will not let a single day go by where I don’t think about all I have to be grateful for.

Each day brings an abundance of beauty, wonder, and joy. Make a point of stopping to take a look around and drink it all in. Each breath you inhale and exhale, the soft breeze of the wind swaying the leaves on the trees, the delicious food you’re nourishing your body with, the canopy of clouds overhead, and the shoes you slip onto the soles of your feet. Don’t go to bed without recognizing all you’ve been blessed with.

I will not swallow my truth.

Because each time you do, your voice, your heart, and your soul shrink a little more. And you were born to be seen and to be heard. If you feel the urge to say something, say it. If you feel the need to do something, then do it. Don’t hold back. Quit hiding your heart. Speak your truth, and allow it to set you free next year.

I will not stay with someone who makes me feel lonely.

Because the truth is, you can feel completely content and whole on your own – so why waste your time feeling empty with someone else?

I will not be a bystander to my own life.

This coming year, stop watching other people live beautiful lives, while you sit out on the sidelines and allow life to swallow you up. Assume the starring role, rise up, and start taking control of your destiny. Your life will be what you choose to make of it.

I will not be afraid to try something new.

Fear has held you back for far too long. Now is the time to dig deep and gather all the courage you can find within, and do things a little differently next year. Take that risk, book that adventure, kiss that person, switch careers, move across the world, dance in the middle of the street, say hey to that stranger… this is how you will make the most of all of your moments next year.

I will not be too hard on myself.

Because as long as you’re doing the best you can, that’s all there is. Sometimes you’ll have more to give, other times you’ll have a little less, and that’s okay. Stop thinking that you need to be a perfect human, creating a perfect life inside a perfect world.

You will fuck things up, you will hurt someone you love, you will make bad choices, and you will fail. Because that’s life, and that is how you grow and make better decisions the next time around.

When you get things wrong next year, remember that mistakes don’t damage you unless you allow them to – they cleanse you.

I will not live this year like I did the last.

Because to do that would be to stunt your growth, and life is all about evolving. If you’re not growing, you’re only dying. Next year, live each day with intention, with purpose, and with passion. You know all of those things you talked about doing this year? Make a plan to do them next year. Embrace life and open yourself to all that it’s desperate to offer you.