I wish I could tell you it gets better.
But it doesn’t.
Like Joan Rivers said, “It doesn’t get better. You get better.”
As the sun sets upon each day, you will have learned, you will have grown, and you will have changed. Maybe not a lot, but at least a little.
You become resilient. You get pushed down, and you jump right back up. You take every no, every rejection, every setback, on your chin; and keep fighting on in pursuit of all the yes’s you know lie ahead of you, patiently waiting for you to reach out and grab them with both hands.
You will learn to be less sensitive. This might be harder for you than most. But you will eventually understand not to take everything as a bullet aimed at your sweet heart. Because you’ll come to realise that nothing other people do is because of you, it is because of themselves. Don’t lose your sensitive soul completely though – it’s most certainly a gift to feel so deeply, in a way that others can’t begin to imagine.
You grow stronger.
This might happen quietly, little by little, until one day you take a step back and have a careful look at yourself. And you’ll see it. You’ll see the huge leaps forward you have made from where you once were. And you’ll think to yourself, ‘wow, I did that.’ Because you never knew you had that kind of strength residing in you all along. But trust me, it was there.
You will grow wiser. If you pay close attention, every day has a blessing or a lesson waiting for you, you just have to open your heart to it. Make mistakes, learn from them, try not to make the same mistake again. Be forgiving, do your best to forget. Sometimes you won’t and you shouldn’t. Other times you must.
You finally begin to realise your worth. So fiercely, that no one on the planet could drag you back down to feeling worthless, ever again. You realise the true measure of worth comes from within you, only you, and is not dependent on anyone else’s beliefs. You won’t be ruled by others, you belong to yourself.
You will finally understand that you own your worth.
You become a fucking wolf. A lion. A warrior. You stop taking people’s shit. You stand up; you stand with pride, and finally take on the starring role in the epic show that is your life. You no longer make apologies for who you are and what you believe in. You have BIG love for that person, and screw anyone who doesn’t match that – you no longer need or want validation. You’re not done yet though. No. Every day is a new opportunity to become an even better version of yesterday’s you. And you’re not prepared to waste a single one.
I wish I could tell you it gets better. It doesn’t. But I know that you do.