10 Everyday Struggles For People Who Are ‘Socially Selective’

1. Staying in and being cozy almost always sounds so much better than going out.

It’s Friday and your friends and you have been meaning to hit up that new club that just opened up, but a cup of tea and some takeout sounds just as good. We’ve all been there. On the one hand, getting dressed up and putting on that cute new outfit you’ve been meaning to take for a spin sounds like the best idea, but on the other hand, lying in bed wearing your pajamas and starting that new series on Netflix sounds even better.  

2. There are people who think you’re just a bit of a bitch.

It’s not that you’re unfriendly, but you’re just painfully shy around new people. It’s awkward when they see you laughing it up with your friends and then the next moment you’re as timid as a mouse. It doesn’t come off well, but you genuinely don’t mean anything by it.

3. Meeting and making new friends is hard.

You have no qualms about widening your friendship circle; in fact, you enjoy meeting new people. You just take a much longer time than most people to open up to new friends. You are cautious with who you trust and that’s alright.

4. You’ve been told multiple times that you’re hard to read.

You aren’t doing it on purpose, you just happen to be a little more reserved. Especially on days when you aren’t really feeling social.

5. You frustrate your friends when you put off meeting them over and over.

It’s not that you don’t want to meet up and hang out with them, you do! It’s just that you were really feeling it when you made those plans, and on the day of the meet up, you wake up in a funk and you know you won’t be any fun to be around.

6. Dating is hard.

Try explaining to the guy you actually really like that it’s not because you don’t like him but it’s just one of those days where you crave a bit of space and time to yourself instead of hanging out with him.

7. Only a small handful of friends and family understand.

You’ve tried explaining your situation to your new friends but some of them don’t quite get it and they just assume you’re either boring or a bit pretentious.

8. The highs and the lows are quite the roller coaster.

Some days you basically won’t shut up and some days you’ll barely say ten words. It’s quite an adjustment between the two states of mind and sometimes there’s no in-between. You can’t even understand it yourself, even though you’ve tried your whole life.

9. Talking to that waitress can actually be quite nerve-wrecking.

It sounds childish, but sometimes even speaking to waitresses or the guy behind the counter can give you a little bit of a panic attack.

10. Doing life is just tough sometimes. 

It can be exhausting fluctuating between wanting to be social and wanting to be alone, and it’s even harder to make sure that your friends know that you don’t hate them.