If You Really Care About Her, Let Her Know Before It’s Too Late

Allef Vinicius

If you care about her, you need to be honest with her.

You can’t keep playing these games expecting her to read your mind, because she can’t and she hates it. She may go around telling everyone she’s great at reading people but the truth is, with you, she’s always been blind.

She doesn’t know what to think anymore because you’re pulling her in so many different directions. One minute you’re finding every excuse to talk to her and the next you’re pretending like she doesn’t even exist. You’re either pulling her in closer or pushing her further away.

She doesn’t know how to act around you because she never knows how you’ll act around her. Every time she holds on to hope, her expectations are met with disappointment. But, every time she swears she’s done with you for good, you shine that gorgeous smile, lace her fingers through yours, and she’s back to where she started.

But, if you actually care about her, you need to stop stringing her along because she’s not going to wait around forever. She’s put up with all the mixed signals, with this constant emotional rollercoaster, because she cares about you. Deep down, she sees the light that you can’t even see in yourself. She goes out of her way to try to understand you when no one else gives you a fair chance. She sits through conversations with her friends who tell her to let you go. She defends you in any way she can, even when she shouldn’t.

But, she isn’t stupid. She knows her worth and she knows she doesn’t have to settle for this. She won’t keep bending over backwards for someone who won’t do the same. She can’t keep up with this whiplash of feelings, when you aren’t being clear about yours.

She can’t keep over-analyzing your every little move. It’s not fair for her to have to second guess every moment she spends with you. She wants to know that your stolen glances mean what she thinks they do. She wants to know that your lingering hands want so much more too.

But you never take things one step farther. Because every time she thinks things are finally going the way she’s waited for them to, you pull back. You stop yourself from getting too close. You act cold and distant. You tell her you’re no good for her anyways. You tell her she should find someone better. That she deserves someone better.

And you’re right, she does. She deserves someone who is sure of her. She deserves someone who isn’t going to leave her hanging, someone who understands that she isn’t the type of girl that should be left waiting around.

But the truth is, the person we need and the person we want are often never the same. And right now, she doesn’t care about what it is she needs. She doesn’t want someone who is “good” for her. She just wants you.

She wants the games to end. She wants things to be simple again. She wants to be able to be herself around you like she used to do so easily. She wants to move on from this complicated limbo of almosts and what ifs. She wants to know that you feel the same because she has absolutely no idea if you truly do anymore.

Maybe she’s wrong about you. Maybe she’s a fool for believing in every word you’ve ever said. Maybe she’s just reading into things way too much. Maybe she should’ve listened to everyone else and given up ages ago.

But maybe she’s right about everything. Maybe the person she sees when she looks into your eyes has been there all along.

Maybe you’re pushing her away because you’re scared of how you feel. Maybe you don’t want to hurt her and you think you always will. Maybe you think she would be happier with someone a little less like you. Maybe this has nothing to do with your feelings for her and everything to do with the feelings you have towards yourself.

Maybe it’s not that you think she deserves better, it’s that you think you deserve worse. Maybe you don’t think you’re worthy of a good girl like her. Maybe you couldn’t be any surer about her, but can’t help but feel so unsure about yourself. Maybe somewhere along the line, you convinced yourself that you aren’t worthy of happiness or love.

But you are. She knows it, she’s just waiting on you to realize it too. She’s willing to take a chance on you, but that means nothing if you aren’t willing to take a chance on yourself first.

So, if you care about her, forget about your insecurities. Forget about everything that can go wrong and start thinking about everything that can go right. Face your fears.

If you care about her, tell her now. Let yourself get lost in love, before it’s her you end up losing. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Sara Di Tullio

Finding my truth one word (and coffee) at a time.

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