To The Girl Who Thinks She’s Fat

So word on the street is, you think you’re fat. I’ve been there. I can’t say I know exactly how you feel, because I don’t. Only you know that. But what I do know is this; you are not fat. And you never will be.

You are unique and created to be exactly who you are. Whether you believe you were hand crafted by God, or a random creation of a combination of genetics- either way- there were no mistakes in the making of you.

“You don’t even know me.” I’m sure that’s what you’re thinking. And to some degree—you’re right. I may not know you personally, but I lived by the identity of “fat” for a very very long time. I wore that title on my forehead as if it was all that I was. I tried every diet in the book. I even starved myself down to a skeleton at one point. I’ve been so desperate to not be fat that I gave up everything else in my life to strive for that one goal. And you know what? I did all that, just to come to the realization that I was never once “fat.”

Sure, my weight has been all over the board. I’ve been overweight, underweight, and everywhere in between. But not once, not even for a second, was I fat. And neither are you.
You see, we live in a society that is so hyper focused on body image and the ideal of “thin” that at times we can be taken captive by the identity of “fat.” We’ve been socialized to believe that if we just had the perfect body then all of life’s troubles would suddenly settle and everything would fall into place perfectly. But the truth is, “fat” is a fabricated identity and a misused word.

You will never be fat. Yes, you have fat. We all do. But you also have fingers, hair, hormones, and a beating heart. But we don’t go around saying “I am dopamine” now do we? That’s because that’s not who you are. It’s part of you. You need it to stay alive. It helps make you a living, breathing, beautiful creature, but it does not define you as a person.

We’ve taken a word that’s meant to be a component of our physiological making, and turned it in to a descriptive label of worth. The thing is though, a simple noun cannot tell you what you’re worth. A number on a scale can’t measure the joy to this world you bring. Besides, all that weight really is is our relationship to gravity. Cool. That’s neat. But other than that, who cares?
You are beautiful. Breathtakingly beautiful. And that has nothing to do with the measurement of your waist, and it never will. You are beautiful because of who you are at your innermost core. You’re stunning because of the way you love, the way you laugh, the way you live. Your passions make you gorgeous, and your laughter is beyond contagious.

I would like to say that I could completely sway you to stop measuring your worth in pounds, and start finding your worth in the beauty of each moment that your heart is still beating. But that is unlikely. So my hope for you is that you take what you hear me saying, and you even if it’s just for a moment, are filled with a sense of empowerment and confidence. And my wish is for you to come back to this moment of truth each time you begin to fall for the lie that tells you you’re fat. Because that is exactly what that is, a complete and utter lie.

Take a deep breath. Stop for a moment and be still. Go outside. Let the sun illuminate the beauty from within. And remember that you are worth so much more than the voices that tell you you must strive for perfection. Because my dear friend, perfection simply does not exist. It’s an unobtainable goal. But what is real and unchanging is the fact that you are perfectly imperfect just as you are. You’ve already reached the closest thing to perfect, and that is to simply be who you are right in this very moment.