When I was in senior year of high school there was this really cute guy in my programming class. I had a huge crush on him and I really wanted him to ask me out; keep in mind I was raised to believe it was improper for a girl to ask a guy on a date, I’m wiser now.
We became friendly and I moved my seat next to his. Over the next several weeks I would constantly flirt with him, talking about movies I knew he’d like, chatting about video games, touching his hands while we talked, complimenting him, making the occasional sexual innuendo. I was trying so hard to get him to ask me on a date. He actually asked another girl to prom, so I figured he wasn’t interested. I laid off the flirting for a while.
One day during class we were talking about relationships, and I said “You know, I still can’t believe such a cute guy like you is single,” while winking at him. He just shrugged and said his last couple of dates never really went anywhere. Throwing caution to the wind, I looked him square in the eyes and said, “I know if it were me, I wouldn’t say no to a second date.” He got the message that time and immediately asked me out, at which point the guy sitting a few seats down yelled “FINALLY!”
As it turns out, I was just as oblivious to his flirting and hints over the last several months as he was to mine, so he thought I wasn’t interested in him. Everyone else in the class had picked up on it, but not us.
And that’s how two very oblivious people got married.
In high school my cousin was offered a ride home from a cute girl that he liked. He was confused when she passed his house, but he didn’t say anything. She drove for a bit and pulled into an empty, secluded parking lot. Then she looked over at him and said something along the lines of, “Now that we’re stopped here, is there anything you wanna do?” He thought for a second and then said, “Yeah, I don’t think my door’s shut all the way.” So he opened his door and re-shut it. The girl gave him a weird look and just drove him home.
He said he literally walked into his room, sat down on his bed, and then let out a big, “…OHHHH!”
“Do you wanna hook up?”
When I showed up at his house he was actually surprised that I wanted to have sex with him. I literally said, “I just want to have sex with you, please stop talking.”