1. You don’t need to still be falling for the person you loved in high school. The past is tempting, but being brave enough to move forward will help you in the long run.
2. You don’t need to find the love of your life in college. It might seem like everyone is pairing off, but in reality, you went to college to grow yourself – emotionally and mentally – not to find a husband or wife.
3. You have so much more growing to do than you think. But you’ve also learned a lot more than you think.
4. You don’t need to feel like your college hook ups define your love life. The only person who defines your love life is you.
5. There are still so many changes to come, which means your tastes and wants and who you love might change. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
6. Be hungry for love, but don’t be thirsty about it. In short: get into a relationship because you want to be with that one person, and not just because you want to be in any relationship.
7. Make your own rules about sex — who you want to sleep with, who you don’t, when the time is right. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says or thinks, it matters what feels right to you.
8. For every guy or girl who ignores you and doesn’t answer your texts, there is someone who will. So don’t get hung up on the ones who don’t give you the attention you deserve.
9. Breakups sting and leave you feeling like you won’t be whole again. But you will be able to mend your broken heart, and it will end up being stronger than it was before.
10. When it feels like things are turning out for the worst, try to find one positive thing that is happening as a result of the train wreck. Chances are that one thing is an open door you’ll want to peek into.
11. You are not limited to one love in your lifetime. Love happens more than once a lifetime, and it will for you, too.
12. There is no rule book for what does and what doesn’t constitute staying in a relationship, even if it becomes long distance. If you want to fight for it, you should, but if you’re having second thoughts, don’t write those off.
13. Love doesn’t always mean butterflies in your stomach and chasing someone you think is the “one.” Sometimes love is what happens when you know you can trust someone and be yourself with them 100% of the time.
14. The people you love, romantically, aren’t the only soul mates in your life. Make sure you give all the other soul mates in your life the attention they deserve.
15. Abandoning your friends because of your new significant other will never be a good idea. Don’t lose touch with the people who will always be there for you because you think your relationship is “supposed” to take up all your time.
16. If you’re in a relationship that makes you doubt yourself, pick fights, and puts you on edge more than it brings you joy, then you’re in the wrong relationship. And being “comfortable” in your relationship isn’t a good enough reason to stay in it.
17. If you have never been in love, or never been in a serious relationship, you are not “behind,” nor are you missing out. You are focused on you, and that is something that can attract love to you later on.
18. You’re allowed to change your mind about who you love and what you want. Nothing is set in stone right now.
19. When someone wants to be with you without a “label,” think about whether you’re content with an almost relationship, and actually be honest with yourself. Because you don’t owe someone else a favor as much as you owe yourself the truth about how you really feel.
20. Who you are supposed to end up with can’t be reduced to buzzwords like “soul mate” or “high school sweetheart” or “first love” or even “second love.” So if you don’t have any of those right now, don’t worry, because it’s about so much more than that anyway.