50 Brutally Honest Questions You Need To Ask Yourself Before You Can Fully Feel Committed To Someone Else

Collages By Holden
Collages By Holden

1. Where do I actually want to be in five years?

2. What three things do I currently prioritize in my life?

3. What things do I want to prioritize in my life as I continue to grow?

4. What are my career goals?

5. What am I willing to compromise on for a relationship, and where am I unwilling to compromise?

6. What do I love to do when I’m alone?

7. Will I push myself to take “just for me” time even when I’m living with a significant other in the long-term?

8. Am I the type of person who pushes friends away when I get into a relationship?

9. How do I show my friends and family how much I value them on a regular basis?

10. Do I prefer recharging on my own or with someone else?

11. What qualities do I value most about myself?

12. What do other people value most about me?

13. Am I able to admit when what’s best for someone else isn’t what’s best for me?

14. How often can I afford to go out with my significant other without overspending on my end or theirs?

15. What scares me the most about being in a committed relationship?

16. What has kept me from commitment in the past?

17. What has pushed me into committing too quickly in the past?

18. What are three non-negotiables that I need from a relationship?

19. How do my ex(es) still affect my emotional life, if at all?

20. Do I feel secure and validated in my own skin, or do I still crave a significant other’s approval?

21. When do I rely on others to motivate me, and when am I able to push forward and motivate myself?

22. When a situation escalates, how do I diffuse it in a productive and conscientious way?

23. What is one major issue that got in the way of my last relationship?

24. If I could do it again, what would I change about my behavior in my last relationship?

25. How much do I care about what other people (specifically my close friends and family) think of my relationship?

26. Would I be willing to lose friends over my relationship, and if so, why?

27. If I were ever in a worrisome situation, would I work to extract myself, or would my love for another person cloud my judgment?

28. How would I want a significant other to define “commitment” in order to align with my definition of commitment?

29. When I’m angry, hurt, or upset, am I more apt to become withdrawn, or face the problem head on?

30. If I’m someone who refuses to confront my issues, what prompts me to discuss things openly with someone else?

31. Is money something that matters to me in a partnership?

32. Would it make me uncomfortable to be bringing in more or less money than a significant other I was living with, or a spouse?

33. What are the essentials of your daily routine?

34. Are you set in your ways, or are you malleable and willing to be pushed around?

35. If you’re someone who often defers to someone else’s preferences, what specific methods do you use to assert yourself and make sure your needs are met?

36. What typically turns you on most during sex, and are you okay about providing someone with direction?

37. Are you a morning person or a night owl?

38. Are you neat, messy, or somewhere inbetween?

39. Do you need someone to have certain religious beliefs to see a future with them?

40. What role does alcohol, caffeine, weed, drugs, etc. play in your life? How would you react if someone was more or less dependent on a substance — any substance — than you are?

41. What do you physically need from a new relationship? Are you saving yourself, or do want to be having sex seven times a week?

42. How much PDA are you comfortable with? Does the level of comfort change when you’re around friends, versus around strangers?

43. Are you all for inviting porn, sex toys, or other things of a similar nature into a relationship?

44. What are three characteristics you have that no one would expect about you after only meeting you once?

45. Is there a pattern in the men or women you tend to date? Are they always tall, short, funny, family-oriented, bad for you, etc.?

46. What are your political preferences and how strong are they? Are you willing to date someone (especially seriously) who has opposing political values?

47. Why do you want to find a partner?

48. Are you tempted to take relationship steps because people around you are taking them?

49. Do you embarrass easily, or are you the type of person who instantly wants to show people the good and the not-as-good parts of themselves?

50. If something is preventing you from putting yourself out there, or opening up to new love, what is it? And what are you doing to challenge that? Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Maya Kachroo-Levine

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