1. You’re the one who loves less, but it’s not because you have less love to give. It’s that you’re scared to give too much of yourself. When someone is okay with loving you at your worst, it makes you feel like you owe them more than you can give. You’re torn between appreciation and running away before you’re bound to that person’s support.
2. You prefer to figure out problems on your own, instead of letting another person weigh in. You feel like bringing up your shit constantly is a burden, so you keep it to yourself and work through your challenges on your own.
3. You struggle to be satisfied in the present. You like the chase too much, but find post chase “bliss” anticlimactic.
4. Something you’ve come to expect out of relationships is that they end. Often badly. When you’ve become accustomed to things going wrong, you assume that’s your default. That’s the extent of your love luck.
5. You lean in to confrontation. Small fights stay in the forefront of your mind and you have trouble letting go of insignificant conflicts especially when you know you’re right.
6. Alternately, you avoid confrontation altogether because you don’t want to deal with the repercussions of calling someone else out. When there’s too much going on in your life, or your relationship, harping on every fight isn’t worth your time.
7. You feel guilty about the fact that you like your space. You like cooking dinner without having to accommodate someone else’s preferences, watching the shows you want to watch, putting the volume as high as you’d like. You’ve never needed someone to share your bed with, you like sleeping diagonally.
8. You’re difficult to love. You find it hard to fully accept someone else’s love because you worry you’re not giving enough back in return. Even if it’s only apparent to you, you feel guilty for it.
9. You spend more time apologizing than you actually need to.
10. You’re overly realistic and worry about problems everyone else has, but doesn’t get concerned over. Even if you don’t think the grass is greener, you’re honest with yourself about that fact that you might want to sleep with other people at some point.
11. You’re particular about your routine, and generally having trouble fitting someone else into it. Tasks that are “easier with two people” don’t cross your mind. You like the ease of not having to plan around someone else’s schedule.
12. You don’t feel the need to explain when you’re feeling withdrawn or distant. You need someone that can deal with that fact without asking too many questions, or worrying about the security of your relationship.
13. When you’re in a relationship, you help facilitate good things and change for the other person. But you worry if you always take on that role, you run the risk of being the static character in your own life. And that’s a dealbreaker for you.
14. Being tied down to any situation makes you feel caged. You’re the opposite of everyone planning out a long term relationship. You’re just trying to take it day by day, and see what you can handle.
15. You feel attacked more easily than you’d like to admit. You call someone out if they’re ever trying to make you feel smaller than you are – even if it’s unintentional.
16. You can’t help seeing someone’s shortcomings, just like you have trouble forgiving yourself for yours.
17. You’re not scared of settling down, you’re scared of settling for obligation.