20 People Reveal What Happened To The Marriage Pacts They Made When They Were Younger
"Had one to get married at 30. I got married before that and I don't think my friend took it well."
Answers found on Ask Reddit
1. “I did. I dated my first girlfriend when we were about 17-19. Then she broke up with me but we had said such a thing before while we were still dating. We both had a few boy/girlfriends over the years, but about 15 years later we met again and essentially said “I really didn’t find anyone with whom I felt like I did with you”. But it wasn’t with resignation, more of an epiphany. So we started dating again, and married soon after. And couldn’t be happier.”
2. “Had one for 30 and moving in together. She was 7 years my senior and around that time we were both in a transient part of our lives, so I asked. She said no and moved across the country.”
3. “We didn’t do this exactly, but when we were 19 we joked that we should get married if we’re both 35 and single. Two years later, I came home for a week from college, we hung out in our normal friend group, and she and I hooked up for the first time. We ended up starting a relationship, got married when we were 27, and are still together at 30. Not a result of the “pact” obviously, but funny that we ended up married anyways.”
4. “I had one of these with my best female friend from high school, but it was 30 not 40. Meanwhile I’ve gotten married twice before 30 and she would’ve been my best (wo)man at both weddings but she was in OCS the first time deployed the second time… doesn’t seem meant to be, does it?
All that said, if something weird happened and I was single and she remembered the pact I’d absolutely hold up my side.”
5. “I think, if memory serves, my wife and I had one of those. But, we ended up together and married in our early 20s.”
6. “Had one to get married at 30. I got married before that and I don’t think my friend took it well. We had sort of a strained relationship after and now we don’t really talk much. (Used to be best friends)”
7. “We ended up getting married at 30 instead. As it turns out we loved each other and made every excuse to ignore it.”
8. “‘Weird’ couple my wife knew had such a pact and followed through.
Girl was a really introverted, quiet, homely type. Sweetest girl. But she never had a boyfriend as far as I knew. And we saw her off and on for six or seven years.
Then suddenly out of nowhere she invited us to her wedding.
Anyways, it was to a guy we had met a couple of times who was one of her friends who seemed very much like her. My wife teased her that “more must have been going on all that time.” but she was straight up about it, and said no, they just decided it was time.
Conversation was something like, “yeah, you know how people have pacts to get married if neither of them are till they hit ___, well, we just decided it really wasn’t going to happen for either of us, and to cut that short.”
Basically we were just like, “cool?” and then left it at that.
Anyways, she married him, they looked happy. The speeches were a bit odd, they didn’t really talk about love but a lot about how they were marrying their best friend.
They are still together, it’s gotta be at least 5 years, and they have a little kid. Last we saw them they looked happy and that’s all that matters really.”
9. “I have/had one of those with my bff. She turns 40 in a couple months and she is definitely single. We havent spoken about it in over a decade. We are super close to this day, but I dont want to bring it up when she turns 40. Ive tried a number of times to make the relationship happen and at this point I am just gonna accept that it isnt meant to be unless she brings it up. I love her, and I know she loves me too. I guess we’ll see if she remembers and wants to follow through, but Im not holding my breath.
(Narrator: he was holding his breath)”
10. “I know a couple at my church who were friends first, like best friends and when they got in their 30s they still weren’t engaged or married to anyone so they decided to get married. They’re still together and very much in love.”
11. “It wasn’t for marriage, but in high school, I had a deal with my wife that if she was single at the time she’d go to prom with me. We ended up dating a few months after that, and have been together for twelve years now.”
12. “Friends since we were 14 in high school. Made a pact in our early 20s about if we were 30, childless, unhappy, etc.
Got married at 30. 7 years later it’s still the best relationship we’ve ever had and going strong.”
13. “I had several pacts like this over the years. Within a year, they were all in serious relationships. I was like the Wedding Bargain Matchmaker.
All good though, been with a great woman for almost four years now, and we were good friends for seven years before that.”
14. “I did that. I met her in high school, we grew apart over the years, we reconnected and said “let’s get married if we’re both single when we’re 40” then we said fuck it, let’s go to Vegas and get married by Elvis. Our first kiss was Thanksgiving Day and we were married on Dec 17th. We’re still going strong after seven years! Longest relationship I’ve been been in, best decision of my life!”
15. “I had this one friend I would hook up with on an off for years and we had this pact if she hit 30 we would marry, I would be 35. I always avoided actually dating her because she cheated on every boyfriend she was ever with and was a bit of a nomad. I told her I didn’t want to ruin the friendship. When I got engaged to my wife my FWB was livid. She figured she can have all the fun and we’d get married at some point. I never spoke to her again after my engagement. She got married last year. I congratulated her but got no response.”
16. “My family has a summer place on a lake in another state where I have gone every summer since I was a baby. Other families did the same so, I grew up with these other family’s kids. There was like 10 kids in our group and we spent almost every waking hour hanging out together. One of the girls in the group was about a year older and kinda shy and chubby. Not that it mattered though we were just really good friends.
Fast forward to our early 30’s years. She had moved away from her small town much to the amazement of her family. It was the kind of small town that you were born in and would probably die in. Nobody ever left but, she did. She had a great job where she was able to make and save a TON of money. She had also lost weight and had become crazy beautiful. At the same time, most of our group of friends were getting married and working on having families. As a joke one of our friends said “Hey if you two are still single when you hit 40, you HAVE to marry each other. We had been drinking so it was easy to get us to agree.
Fast forward again. Before I hit 40, I met the love of my life and have 2 bad-ass little ones. The girl from the lake had moved back to her little town and fell into the trap. She met a dude at a bar one night who got her pregnant and was never to be seen again. She was alone with her little one and, to be close to her family, she remained in the little town and had abandoned the path of a successful life that she had been on before. We still see each other every summer, and my wife hates it. She says it’s “so obvious that she still has a crush on you”. It’s weird how when you look back you can see those decisions that seem small at the time but have a huge effect on life. I could have married her and she would probably would have been in a better place now. But, I would not be where I am now if I went down that road. Life is weird man.”
17. “My friend and I had something like that in high school. But it was 30 and we ended up dating until we turned 30 and got married.”
18. “A friend and I made a pact in college that we would marry each other if we’re both single by the time I’m 30. I’m turning 30 in a few years.
We barely spoke for the last 7 years. He now has a girlfriend and lives in another country. I don’t think it’s going to happen.”
19. “I made the pact with my best friend when we were 15 that if we were single by 30 we’d get married. We’re 29 and still talk to each other daily. We’re also both single. She also remembers the pact. /sweats”
20. “Oh god no! Mine was with my best friends mother!
She actually made a point of reminding me a few years ago.”