26 People On How To Tell A Relationship Is Nearing The End

Booking tickets to see a concert 6 months from now? Nope!

Updated 8 years ago, July 7, 2016

1. When you can’t stand to be around him.

“When you get home, you find yourself sitting in your car, just taking a few extra minutes and some deep breaths before you go inside.”

2. The memories are better than the actual reality.

“When you miss the memories more than your partner.”

3. Booking tickets to see to a concert 6 months from now? Nope.

“You hesitate to make future plans with them.”

4. When they make you nervous for all the wrong reasons.

“From personal experience I would have to say when I find that I am unable to relax around my current partner. If I feel on edge because I’m nervous that we are going to get into an argument or I have to be on my best behavior to make you want to hang out with me then we are headed for a break up. I broke up with my last ex when I realized that my hands were shaking once I got in my car after hanging out.”

5. If you change your behavior to please him.

“I was exhausting myself picking particular clothing to wear, only checking my phone when he was in the bathroom, being super sweet even when I wasn’t in a sweet mood just in hopes we could get through a night without arguing. He finally dumped me for “lying” about something I did not lie about, and as bad as it hurt at the moment I thank god he did it because I realize now how controlling of my life he was becoming. I knew a break up was well on its way, I think that’s why I was trying so hard. I had this stupid notion that maybe if I behaved well enough he would stay. It took him dumping me to realize I shouldn’t have to behave like a child in order to keep a man.”

6. You ignore their phone calls.

“Your phone rings, it’s her, and you don’t want to answer.”

7. When you grow out of the relationship.

“When you aren’t on the same page with what you want out of the relationship.”

8. Infatuation to boredom to irritation to break up. Rinse, repeat.

“Most people have a recognizable pattern that they go through with romantic relationships, beginning with how they first behave toward a prospective paramour and eventually culminating in a breakup of one form or another. It’s similar to the concept of having a “type” – a certain description which applies to the individuals they date – except that it’s closer to being a habit than anything else. For example, we’ve all likely known someone who goes through a routine of becoming infatuated with a new partner, then bored by them, and finally irritated, only to restart the entire cycle when they meet someone new and interesting. (That latest someone is always “the one” at first, aren’t they?) Anyway, as a result of these patterns existing, different people will behave in different ways when they’re heading toward a breakup… but there are a few indicators of that trend which are more or less universal.”

9. General apathy towards the other person.

“Fights, at least on their own, aren’t necessarily omens of an impending split. After all, we tend to be most angered by the people for whom we have the strongest feelings. When those same feelings start to evaporate, though, it’s usually an indicator that neither party really cares about the other anymore.”

10. Reluctance in bringing up your boyfriend or girlfriend when talking to new people.

“You find yourself not bringing up that you have an SO so quickly into conversations with the opposite sex.”

11. Captain obvious.

“Posting on reddit asking for telltale signs that you’re heading for a breakup.”

12. You find out they are bi/want to be poly and you’re not feeling it.

“She stops asking about your life, stops with pet names, the sex stops or becomes uncomfortable for the other person, she says she has guards up suddenly, she’s acting weird because of x, y, or z, she can’t hold a conversation any longer, she doesn’t want to cuddle, kisses become pecks, she stops coming to you for kisses or pecks…
Then you have a great weekend where everything seems wonderful…
… then she texts you she wants to be with you, but she wants you to accept that she wants to sleep with other women for the emotional, intimate, and sexual connection that a man can’t give her and she’s not willing to give that up… She won’t meet to talk about it or pick up her phone.. Only text.. Yet you’re still an amazing person she wants to be with. This was my weekend.”

13. Doing anything you can to avoid them.

“Watching tv constantly when together in house.”

14. When going abroad alone puts things into perspective.

“After 5 months you’ll go abroad for two weeks alone and realise you’re happier than you’ve been in years because you’re away from her. Then you’ll come back home and end the relationship. This will lead to her pleading with you not to leave and promising she’ll change, totally contradicting everything she said previously.”

15. The sex is gone.

“When they start being distant with you, especially physically. Where before you might have sex 2 or 3 times a week all of a sudden it’s been 2 and a half weeks, and when you try to broach the subject she says she doesn’t want to. Kisses aren’t nearly as passionate as they were, and before long she’s wanting to come over because you two need to talk.”

16. The proof is in the texting.

“When you get a text that says “We need to talk.”
Or when she starts replying to literally any text with “k””

17. On second thought…

“When you realize you don’t want to bring them to a work event because you aren’t proud to be with them anymore.”

18. When you can’t stand to be around him.

“When you get home, you find yourself sitting in your car, just taking a few extra minutes and some deep breaths before you go inside.”

19. Maybe a secret OkCupid profile??

“They start closing and minimizing windows when you walk in the room. “So you’re just looking at the Microsoft welcome screen?”

20. The gifts stop coming.

“She doesn’t buy you sushi anymore.”

21. No more couples selfies. Damn. That’s serious.

“Before my ex and I broke up we went on a vacation we had planned for a year. We both knew things weren’t going well, but we both cared a lot about each-other and we didn’t want to cancel our trip.The trip was a road-trip to the Pacific NW, and every time we pulled off the road to see something or take picture the same thing would happen. We would do a selfie together, then I would take a picture of her alone and she would take one of me. We never mentioned it, but we both knew what we were doing. As soon as we got back home we ended it. The pics of us together don’t exist anymore, but I have plenty of pictures of myself in the beautiful Pacific NW!”

22. When you can’t stand to be around him.

“This can be a subtle one, but I have noticed it in almost every breakup I’ve had. For example, you watch a movie and you think your SO might like it, so you say “Hey, check out X, it’s your sort of movie”. When things are going well they might say “Oh, ok” but just before the breakup they are looking to put psychological distance between you, so it ends up turning into “Oh, that’s really not the kind of movie I like.”
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