1. Don’t message your co-workers. See them, say to yourself “I KNEW he was gay” and then block him. I know it’s tempting and you’re excited to behold another gay in the village, but it’s much better for both of you if you invite him out for drinks in person and don’t send him 22 dick pics in a row at the office.
2. Put something in your profile that will make people want to react. u do u, but I don't get profiles that have no picture and everything is n/a, n/a, n/a, and then they hit you up. Girl, wut? How am I supposed to react to a completely blank profile? At least if your profile says you're hung and interested in Beyoncé I will immediately be interested!
3. For the love of lace fronts, please, please my queens, don’t use someone else’s pic as your profile pic! It’s beyond shady. I was in Australia once and saw my friend’s picture on a Grindr profile in Sydney and I immediately sent him a text like, uh, are you in Sydney and you didn’t tell me? Because according to this Grindr screenshot you are!
4. To that end, you only really need one profile. Two profiles doesn’t grant you more coverage.
5. If someone doesn’t reply to your messages, I mean, you should really just take the hint and run with it. People do lose messages, it’s true. But my philosophy about dating and sex and guys and what not is really simple. If someone is interested in you, you will know. It will not be a secret and they will get to you. You’re low on the totem pole if you’re the only one messaging. And that goes for Grindr, Tinder and even when you’ve moved on to Whatsapp.
6. But like seriously, you don’t get to demand a face pic from someone if you don’t have or send a face pic right away. That’s just so uncouth.
7. Some people get too block happy and I just don’t get it.
8. If you’re going to meet up with someone for sex, DO. If you tell them you’re coming over at 1:30, be there, not least because karma is a bitch. You know how it is when you’re really thirsty for something, I mean you can’t wait for it, and it’s promised to you but then LOL NOT IT’S NOT!! There’s nothing worse than someone who promises to bring over some good D or A and then they’re all lol jk.
9. I can’t with people who ask stupid ass questions on Grindr, and by stupid questions I mean topics that are already answered in the profile itself. “Are you white or black?” I mean, my profile says I’m black and you can see my picture.
10. The real secret of Grindr, it’s true magic, lies in the fact that you should only use it when you’re travelling. When you’re at home it’s all the same 9 squares of people all ignoring each other, and that’s just so boring. But when you travel, you’re the fresh meat! You open up Grindr for the first time in a new place and — wow! — 22 messages! You’ll save yourself a lot of frustration with Grindr if you use it sparingly.