5 Things You Learn From A Good First Kiss

Andy Karmy
Andy Karmy

1. If you can stand to kiss them more than once

I’m really weird about kissing. I know it isn’t like this for everyone but to me, kissing someone new is way intimate. A handjob? Sure, fine lol. Kissing? NO. You’re so vulnerable, which means going on a first date with someone and getting to the first kiss is a big step. We’ve all been on dates with handsome suitors and beautiful divas who are like so hot and who tick all our boxes, but when you get to the kiss…it’s just…new or meh or tha’ fuk?, or else its like a piece of unseasoned, boiled chicken: it just doesn’t leave you wanting more. A bad kiss, for whatever reason, doesn’t necessarily make you thirsty for more, no matter how great the person is.

2. Is this a kiss or is he actually fucking your face with his tongue penis?

There’s all kinds of kissers out there, none of them more offensive than the tongue thruster who, no matter how hard you to try to dodge the red tongue penis coming your way, he puts it there anyway. The thing about kissing is that you can never tell how someone does it before you dive right in. The trick, though, is to see if he or she can follow your lead. If you don’t like the tongue thrusts and you show him that you don’t, he’s supposed to adjust to your rhythms and you’re supposed to be suggesting them. If he insists on the tongue penis you might be dealing with a selfish lover. S.O.S.

3. Whether or not there’s chemistry between you

I guess it goes without saying that the best thing you learn from a good first kiss is whether there’s any chemistry between you. The kiss really seals the deal. I’ve been on dates with guys where I thought there was excellent chemistry and then we kissed and meh. So it’s great when you like someone, feel that chemistry and then you kiss and its just like POW! When there’s great chemistry you don’t even notice what you’re doing because you’re transported to this special make out place with little unicorns and where all of your dreams come true.

4. A lazy kisser is a lazy lover

Need I say more?

5. It’s a good thing if you lose yourself in the kiss

When you lose yourself in a good kiss you gently explore each others bodies — his neck, face, hair, arms, you’re sizing him up. You lose yourself in this boy you like, clothes all the way on, sex on the horizon but in no real rush to get there, kissing as a means to itself. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Author of How To Be A Pop Star.

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