Definition: A feeling of listlessness and dissatisfaction arising from a lack of occupation or excitement.
Synonym: You are like completely over it.
Said Like: änˈwē
Used Like: That date I went on last night was so bad that towards the end I was in a complete state of ennui lol.
Definition: to make (something) clear; explain.
Synonym: Wait what?
Said Like: iˈlo͞osiˌdāt
Used Like: He was all, “I need more space” so I asked him to elucidate because we live 400 miles apart. Am confused.
Definition: render obscure, unclear, or unintelligible. Something you do when you don’t want to spill all your tea.
Synonym: A passcode on your iPhone so your boy/girlfriend can’t read your text messages.
Said Like: ˈäbfəˌskāt
Used Like: Wait, so how was the sex!! I’m going to need you to stop obfuscating the details!! This is what BFFs are for.
Definition: occupying a position at, or on both sides of, a boundary or threshold. neither here nor there but some place in the middle, like when you’ve been waiting on the subway for 10 minutes and you could either leave and just walk, but then the train would come as soon as you leave the turnstile. or you could punish yourself and wait who knows how much longer asking yourself WHY.
Synonym: I’m so drukop right now.
Said Like: ˈlimənl
Used Like: Dude, last night was so liminal. I was drunk and horny and sleepy all at the same time so I pretty much fell asleep mid-masturbation with my dick in my hand. No one saw. See Also: drunk texting.
Definition: (of an action or gesture) carried out with a minimum of effort or reflection. also known as procrastination, doing something at the last minute, or giving zero fucks about tasks you’re expected to complete. why? because you maxim and relaxin!
Synonym: Something half-assed, lazy.
Said Like: pərˈfəNGktərē
Used Like: lol you’re getting a bad grade because there is perfunctory written all over this essay!!!
Definition: at equal distances. a special lie told when you are trying to get people to go to a place and you fib about exactly how far away it is.
30 minutes 5 minutes away.
Said Like: ēkwiˈdistənt
Used Like: Well we could go there or we could go to my favorite place. They’re pretty much equidistant (a lie).
Definition: of, relating to, or involving strongly critical, controversial, or disputatious writing or speech. most common traits: 5000 comments on a blog article. often results in television talk show appearances, book deals, short-lived reality television shows.
Synonym: When something goes viral. Also, hate clicking.
Said Like: pəˈlemikəl
Used Like: Wait you guys, did Anna put Kim Kardashian on the cover of Vogue just to be polemical you think??
Definition: cruel and bitter criticism. it’s also a type of acid, so.
Synonym: Throwing a pie in someone’s face. Snatching their wig because you hate them so much r/n.
Said Like: ˈvitrēəl,-ˌôl
Used Like: Don’t remind me about that asshole again. I can’t express the amount of vitriol I have for him.
Definition: of or characterized by solipsism, or the theory that only the self exists, or can be proved to exist. worse than narcissism. see also: every single reality television star ever.
Synonym: Facebook likes. Instagram hearts.
Said Like: sol-ip-sis-tik
Used Like: “OMG my new Facebook pic has like 10,000 likes!” “You’re so solipsistic, there are other people in the world you know!” “Whatever, u just mad!”
Definition: Very weak or slight. as in, our relationship is hanging on by a thread.
Synonym: Not very good. Going nowhere fast :(
Said Like: ˈtenyo͞oəs
Used Like: Things are p tenuous between us at the moment. I think we’re going to break up any day now.