6 Things You Should Never Say To Introverts

1. “Extroverts have more opinions, anyway.”

Uh, wrong! The thing about being either an introvert or an extrovert is that it’s never so cut and dry, and sometimes our personalities can be defined by both traits. But the worst is when people say stuff like “extroverts have more opinions, anyway.” As someone who has taught many college classes, and who went to college himself, I can tell you that just because you talk a lot in class doesn’t always mean you have the most original ideas. I’m always interested in the quiet people in the room, the people who always look engaged but never say anything, the people who are clearly thinking but either aren’t ready to share their ideas right away or who need more time to think things through. It’s not that all extroverts have bad ideas, more that being loud doesn’t mean you’re always right.

2. “Are you ok? What’s wrong? Why are you so sad?”

I literally hate this phrase. It’s not that something’s wrong with us, it’s not that we’re sad, and it’s not that we hate you. It’s just my face. Ok, sometimes something is wrong, but most of the time absolutely nothing is wrong, we just chilling bro and this is how we chill. The real problem with this sentiment is the fear of not getting an immediate response or reaction to something, which extroverts love.

3. “Can you not be so boring?”

Sometimes people think introverts are boring because we are calm, relaxed, and don’t always get turnt up as easily as our more extroverted counterparts. But it doesn’t mean we’re boring! It just means we have fun in completely different ways.

4. “Come on, man. Just put yourself out there.”

And what good will this accomplish? You want to know what’s weird about introversion versus extroversion? You don’t hear introverts screaming at their friends, forcing them to try sitting down in silence and listening to music for a couple hours for fun. But extroverts yell at us all the time about how we need to “get out more” and “put ourselves out there.” Double standard much?

5. “I invited a few more people, is that alright?”

It’s not that I don’t like people or that I don’t enjoy hanging out. It’s more that my initial instinct when I meet someone brand new is to be completely indifferent to them until I feel comfortable. Maybe it’s a waiting period of some sort? Anyway, when I’ve made plans with someone I’m friends with and they invited someone I don’t know I kind of freak out a little, and chances are I won’t be myself around them.

6. “You’re so serious all the time. Lighten up.”

Because we are so quiet and inward, introverts are usually pretty observant creatures who like to watch and listen more than they like to dance and demonstrate. It’s not to say that extroverts aren’t thinkers but more that introverts are people who live in the world of imagination, creativity and deep thought. Those things are fun for us. So to people who like to shoot the shit all the time and be the life of the party, this can look like being “serious” or “too deep,” but really it’s just our way of being in the world. At the end of the day, extroverts and introverts compliment one another, my yang to your yin. To me it just seems like it would be REALLY STRESSFUL to have two extroverts in a relationship. TC mark

image – Shutterstock

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