woman carrying black bag while sitting on brown concrete pathway

This Is Me Accepting That Our Chapter Has Ended

This is me accepting that our chapter has ended. We have reached the end, and no matter how reluctant I am, I have to unclench my grasp on you and let you go. As impossible as it looks, I have to learn to get used to a life without you. I have spent so much time and effort trying to revive our dying relationship, and now I realized how one-sided and futile it was.

While I was busy trying to salvage the ruins of our relationship, you were willing to set us on fire and watch us burn. Whereas I was dreaming of a future together, you no longer saw me as your present. I wanted to hold on to you just a little longer, but you were quick to turn away without a backward glance.

This is me picking up the pieces after the dust has settled. You were the whirlwind romance that swept me off my feet and took my breath away. The dazzling magician who cast a spell on me and bewitched me to a level I never thought possible. The emotive poet who enslaved me with his love and left me enamored in his wake. The one who stole my heart and hurt me in the worst way. I was blinded by my feelings for you and I was desperate to make our relationship work. I was afraid of starting anew when you were all that I wanted.

However, I have learned that it is better to end a dying relationship than to stay with someone who no longer stirs my heart and makes me smile. It is better to walk away with my head held high than to beg for someone’s affection. It is better to be alone than to be trapped in a toxic relationship that brings me untold pain and agony. It is better to walk away now to a future filled with brilliant possibilities and the hope of finding the love of my life than to stay in a vicious cycle that will never change.

This is me saying goodbye to you. I am blinking away tears as our memories together consumes me. Never again will I get to wake up to your face and your warm embrace, feeling as if all is right in the world. Never again will I get to hold you and kiss you one more time. Our times may be short, but for a while, we were happy, and that is enough.

This is me moving on with my life. I am accepting that life does not always turn out the way we expect and it is leading me to where I am supposed to go. That a new beginning will blossom from the most devastating loss.

I am not ready to part from you, but slowly, I will find the courage to begin anew. It will take my utmost effort, but I will keep my distance from you as I take all my time to heal. Gradually, I know that I will stop seeing you in my dreams and wishing you will come back to me. Step by step, I will walk towards the rest of my life, and I know that I will be okay.

I write about falling in love and out of love.

Keep up with Liane on Instagram and medium.com