Thought Catalog

4 Signs You Seek Validation From Others (And How To Overcome This)

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Adi Constantin
Adi Constantin

1. When someone doesn’t approve of your choices, you feel sad.

When you tell someone something, whether it be exciting or mundane, and they ridicule you for being you, stand up for yourself. Do not let someone else make you feel bad for participating in life. Know the difference between a loved one voicing their concern and making you feel bad for being a human. Don’t let your emotion be in the hands of the wrong people.

2. Your happiness is dependent upon who stays and who goes.

I used to really struggle with this one a lot. When we invest too much of our happiness and it becomes dependent upon who stays and who leaves, it’s a recipe for misery. We are not made up of our loss, nor are we made up of our new beginnings. It’s important to recognize when we are feeling low and why, and if our sadness is in the hands of what we do not and cannot control, it’s crucial we take that control back.

3. You sexualize yourself on social media.

Sometimes we place our worth on how many likes we get, how many comments we get that flatter us, or how many online friends we have. It’s pertinent that we do not misinterpret social medias job, meaning, social media should not dictate how we feel about ourselves. There have been countless times when I have had to take a break, or at least monitor what I post; our worth cannot be in the hands of an app.

4. You expect positive reinforcement from your actions.

Sometimes we do things for the response we get from it. Sometimes that can be a good thing, I mean, I have gotten my mom coffee and brought it to her in bed so she would feel happy, but a lot of the time I look for that positive reinforcement in others. It’s important that we learn how to do things regardless of the reinforcement (positive & negative) we get from it. Practice doing things and don’t look nor count on any kind of response from it. Do good because you are good, and of course show gratitude when you do get positively reinforced. TC mark

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