It seems like humans are constantly in this predicament of giving up or trying harder. We battle with ourselves at all hours of the night debating what we should hold on to and make work, and what we should gracefully let go of.

Of course, every relationship has their problems, they all have their strengths just as they have their weaknesses.

However, there is one way to tell if it’s worth putting all of your effort into or if it’s just going to waste your time. 

Love is about intention. Everything about love is about intention. All relationships actually are is just two people who are intending to make a particular commitment to each other.

You cannot be selective with your intent. Meaning, with every single person you meet, you have one true intention with them. You either have the intention to love them at all times, or you don’t. It’s just that simple.

Conflict is the best situation to use to decipher if it’s real love, or if it’s a projection of something else. How we handle conflict is a direct reflection of what our intent is. Our intent doesn’t change when chaos arises.

In the past, I have heard women who explain what conflict looks like for them and their partner. Sometimes I’ve heard women talk about how their significant others deliberately disrespects them by calling them names or poking at their greatest known insecurity.

Here is the honest truth: if our partner intentionally hurts our feelings, they are intentionally not trying to love us.

In our relationships, we are going to accidentally hurt our person’s feelings. Sadly, that’s inevitable.

However, if you purposely try to hurt your person’s feelings – you are purposely choosing to not love them.

Anyone who purposely and intentionally does not love us, should not even get the chance to try.

We are made for big love. Love that doesn’t intentionally touch our soft spots, but rather tries to heal them back to health. We deserve a love that loves us with purpose, not out of insecurity. 

Make sure you are being loved with intent at all hours of the day, even when conflict arises. Make sure you are being loved with the intent of making you blossom, grow, and shine. Make sure you are being loved with the intent of loving you always.