Even though we ended a month or so ago, and even though we both got hurt and confused and a little messed up, I’m so grateful to have met you. And I’m so happy you came into my life, even for that short amount of time.
You were like winter’s first big snowfall. Like summer’s first rainfall. You were fresh and alive and new and I was so enamored by you.
You were what I wished for, if I’m being honest. I wished to be cared for. I wished, if even for a little bit, to feel understood and even loved. And with you, I felt that way.
You were my first kiss on the couch in my new apartment. The first guy I held hands with and felt like they wouldn’t be ripped out of my own. You were the first guy in so long to actually give a damn.
You didn’t see me as a body or toy or a doll. You didn’t see me as someone to mess with or just fuck up my heart just for the sake of it. No, you saw me. Raw and real me.
And I’m so happy you did.
You shone so brightly, all the time. I remember watching you on our second date. Everyone looked your way. Confidence oozed out of you, and your smile was astonishingly genuine.
You were astonishingly rare.
I’m so grateful to you. I’m grateful for the phone calls. For making me feel like I mattered. For making me lovable, after so long of feeling unlovable.
Our story ended shortly. At first, I was gut stricken. I didn’t understand. I couldn’t understand. Because you were so kind and you actually liked me. You said it on our last phone call, which used to annoy me. But now it just makes me smile.
Our story ended shortly. But now I think it was supposed to be that way. It was almost too good to be true. You were almost too pure. Too bright, you could have blinded me.
And even though we said goodbye, I’m so grateful to you.
Thank you for the small gestures that felt like everything at the time. Thank you for the songs and the guitar playing. Thank you for the nights spent talking on the phone for hours. Thank you for making me blush when you held my hand. And thank you for making me feel special. That’s all anyone could ask for.