I’m not waiting any longer. I am done wasting my precious time with thoughts of you, with thoughts that you will ever change your mind and with thoughts that you are worth it.
Because the truth is, you aren’t worth it anymore.
You are not worth another damn thought in my mind. You are not worth another lonely night where I drink too much wine and think about drunk texting you. You are not worth another night of me thinking that my bed is too big for just me and you are not worth another daydream.
It’s funny, because I’m over you. No, really. I know we weren’t meant to be. I know we will never be together again. I know you aren’t the right person for me, and you aren’t my forever.
But just because you are over someone, doesn’t mean you won’t ever think about them. And just because you are over someone, doesn’t mean you won’t ever dream about what could’ve been. And just because you are over someone, doesn’t mean you won’t ever miss them.
But as 2016 comes to an end, so will my lovely thoughts about you and me. And as 2016 comes to a close, so will my hopes of us ever becoming something. And as 2016 comes to an end, you and I will end too.
This is my goodbye to you. This is me letting go of the dream I have held so close to my heart for so long. This is my last letter to you, my last curtain call and my last poem telling strangers about how you loved me.
I’m done thinking about you. I’m done filling my head with silly scenarios of the next time I will see you again. I’m done thinking of what we used to be, and of what I used to have.
I’m done spending so much time in my past, when I have so much more to look forward to.
2017 will be the year you leave. The year you disappear in my sea of thoughts. The year you become someone that I used to love instead of someone that I do love. 2017 is the year that I will officially move forward with my life, instead of being stuck like glue to memories of you.
As I say a goodbye to 2016, I will say goodbye to you too. You, the man who changed my life. You, the man who changed my heart. You, the man who showed me how to love.
Now, I’ll change my life for myself. I’ll love myself greater than you ever had the heart to. And I’ll move forward on my own, without you haunting my every move.