The Truth About Falling For The ‘Nice Guy’ And Why It’s Never Going To Be Worth Your Time


Who is the ‘nice guy’ exactly? Possibly, he’s the stereotypical charmer who couldn’t kill a fly. Or maybe he’s the one you are currently dating who could do no wrong. The ‘nice guy’ has turned from a genuinely kind person, to a guy with a blown up ego. The ‘nice guy’ has turned into what every guy wants to be but fails to do. Because the ‘nice guy’ isn’t so nice after all.

Of course you should date someone wonderful. We should date people who are genuine in their decisions. We should date people who are not only kind, but are real. We should date the guys who have no reason to try to be anyone but themselves.

Somewhere down the line, the ‘nice guy’ has turned into this fake facade of perfection.

The ‘nice guy’ persona has turned into something that isn’t appetizing anymore. It’s not genuine. It’s not real. And I don’t want the nice guy anymore. I don’t want someone who is unauthentic in everything he does. I don’t want someone who tries so hard to be something he isn’t. 

I don’t want the guy who will wake up early in the morning to buy me breakfast in bed. I don’t want the guy who will never dare confront me with a different opinion. I don’t want the guy who holds every door for me.

I don’t want the guy who thinks that being nice equals having sex.

It all sounds nice at first, doesn’t it? Who wouldn’t want to date a gentleman who is chivalrous? Who wouldn’t want to date the guy who gives you gifts randomly? Who wouldn’t want to date the guy who serves you breakfast in bed? Who wouldn’t want to date the guy who lives and breathes for you?

The truth is that, it’s not nice. Because it is dishonest from the start. It is not something that will last forever. These “nice” gestures aren’t gestures of love. They aren’t gestures of kindness. They are gestures to woo you. They are gestures they learned in movies, for men to get what they wanted.

They are gestures that stem from lies.

‘Nice guys’ are always trying to convince you that they are nice. They are always going to boast about the kitten they saved last week, or about the old lady they helped cross the street. They want you to view them as super hero’s. They want you to view them as great people. And of course they are always going to refer themselves as the guys who always get cheated on, or the guys who are always ‘friend zoned’. They want your pity. They want your attention. They do not genuinely love or care for you.

And guess what? You don’t owe a ‘nice guy’ a thing. They expect you to love them after they compliment you. They expect you to have sex with them after they shower you with gifts. They expect you to marry them just because they asked.

They expect you to want them as much as they want you, because they are ‘nice’ and because they are ‘one of the good ones’.

The thing about ‘nice guys’ is that they can’t take rejection. They think to themselves, “Well I gave her roses. How could she not want me now? I even controlled myself enough a wait a day and a half to ask to have sex with her. I am a god!”

But nice guys aren’t gods. They aren’t even decent human beings. And you don’t owe them a thing. Don’t believe their bullshit anymore.

Don’t believe that a ring means forever. Don’t believe that their compliments mean true love.

‘Nice guys’ are fake to their core because they believe that they are invincible. They truly think that their gestures are what makes them earn sex and your attention. They think that’s what love is. And they think that they deserve it. But the truth is, they don’t deserve a thing.

Don’t let ‘nice guys’ get away with this. Don’t let them take away your time. And never let them make you think that you owe them something, just because they acted nicely towards you for a few days. They aren’t worth your time. And you’re worth so much more. I promise.  Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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