Maybe We Aren’t Supposed To Ever Fully Let Go

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I’ve come to find that the most used phrase that people use in giving advice to a recently wounded heart is to “let go”. Their advice is to just simply “let go” of that person and the grief that is wrapped up in your heart.

But my question is, how the hell does anyone that has loved someone simply “let go”?

People tell you that it is finally time to move on. That it’s time to rid yourself of that person, to burn the letters, to wipe the tears and to walk away. They say it with ease, as if losing a human being you once thought you would marry is something to brush off. They tell you “it’s been years” and ask “Why? Why do you still think of him with a sad look on your face? Why do you even mention his name anymore? He’s a thing of the past”, they say. “He’s not your future anymore;  let go of him”, they plead. “Let go of that part of your soul”, they spat.

I’ve come to find that maybe some people don’t understand what it feels like to have loved another person with every bone in your body. I’ve come to find that maybe some people don’t understand love. Because I’d like to think that the whole point of this universe and our presence on this earth is to love and to be loved back. And even if that love fails, we should never treat it as a failure. Shouldn’t we all strive to share our fears with someone without worry? Shouldn’t we all dare to be adored? We break ourselves in fear of rejection and worry ourselves sick about the “what if’s”, but isn’t loving someone better than having not loved at all?

And when it finally happens to you, when love finally steps into your door, please don’t ever let anyone tell you that it wasn’t a big deal. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that that love wasn’t anything short of a miracle. And even if that love fades or ends abruptly and you have to stand by yourself to pick up the pieces, it doesn’t make the love that you had any less beautiful. And it doesn’t give anyone the right to tell you how you should feel about it. In fact, the love that you had? It will always be a part of you. That love will always burn brightly, amidst the whispering darkness that tries to taunt you.

So, when people tell you to get over it and to just let go, just remember how lucky you are to have loved.

No one will ever understand what you two had except for yourselves. And no one will ever be a part of that sacred bond. Love is not a thing to brush off your shoulders. Love is never a thing to let go of. Love is never ever a thing to forget. TC mark

Lauren Jarvis-Gibson

For more poetry and writing follow me on Instagram!

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You look back and you just feel stupid.
You can’t forgive yourself for falling
or believing all the lies.
You reread every text.
You relive every memory.
And it all starts making sense —
he never wanted love.
He only wanted attention.
He only wanted validation.

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