1. People forget that you’re there
Not really. I mean, kinda, but I think we make that whole thing up. It’s our thing. Kinda like the how New York Jets’ things is terrible fans.
2. You grow up fast, but stay young for much longer
Particularly in the teenage years, middle children lead strange double lives; nights might be spent hanging out with people a few years your senior, getting exposed to things that you’ll be able to brag about to your 10th grade cafeteria table.
The days though, are often spent watching Disney channel.
3. You fall in an awkward parenting limbo
As we all know, parents care less about their crazy rules by the time the youngest kid comes around. As the middle child, you often fall in between these rules. So you may still have curfew, but might be treated to a fridge full of junk food.
4. You can look at things from all sides
You’re in the unique position of being both an older and younger sibling. According to every study ever conducted, this is a valuable skill, breeds open-mindedness, and enables you to be a very skilled negotiator. All great qualities for being a drug dealer.
5. You know a lot of people, but don’t really fit into a distinct friend group.
I enjoy likening the middle child experience to a white collar money launderer who’s ruthless with his degenerate dirty money people, but is equally as charming with his 1 percenter friend circle.
Getting older, I’ve noticed this sort of thing has led me to acquiring friends that aren’t necessarily of the same “type.” I.e., one group of friends would never get along with the other, but you respect and can resonate where each of them are coming from. It’s like being the middle child all over again.
6. You constantly feel taken advantage of
According to Katrin Schumann, who wrote a book called “The Secret Power of Middle Children,” middle children are awesome and everyone else sucks. Says Schumann, “Middles can be taken advantage of by friends or co-workers—they are so trusting and cooperative and they can find it hard to say no.”
7. No one really knows how to quantify your successes
Are you supposed to be as successful as your older brother? Does your position in the family hierarchy make you a automatically a burnout? Nobody knows!
8. You’ve got no choice to be crafty
Says psychologist Kevin Lerman, “If a firstborn is a company’s CEO, the middle child is the entrepreneur.”
Meaning, if the position of CEO is already taken, we’ve gotta find another way to #makeit.
9. Your accomplishments aren’t rarely gonna be groundbreaking.
Learned how to ride a bike? Got a job? Married the love of your life?
They’ve probably already happened, and they’re probably gonna happen again. Move along, move along. (like I know you do).
10. You are a constant contradiction
Very much like early 2000s Britney Spears, you’re not a girl not yet a woman in the sense that you mix and match traits associated with the elder and younger siblings. I.e., you’re simultaneously really innocent, but actually not innocent at all.
11. Your pop-culture lexicon is vast
As alluded to in #2, you get the cool, “PG-13 movies when you’re only 9 years old” stuff from your older brother, and the Nicktoons from your younger sister. From The Waterboy to iCarly, you’ve developed a great pop-culture library for optimal reference-making.