Dear God, I Am Letting Him Go

It was beautiful, Lord.

What you had given us was a blessing beyond compare. Thank YOU!

I loved him. I still do. I held on to his soul as if one would be enough for both of us. I thought we could be two persons living and serving You as one.

He was once my sunshine, shining my shadows. You had given me a bundle of music and joy in the form of a man whose smile can reach the Heavens. His kindness and cheerfulness inspired me beyond words.

It was devastating to let go of something so precious. But Lord, we have come to a point where our relationship has been a tag of war. We were pushing and pulling just to keep what we had. There were so many differences between us that our love could only take us this far. I’m sorry, Lord. I’ve disappointed You. I’ve disappointed him.

I’m sorry for hurting him. But I am letting go. If I am rushing in this decision and it isn’t what You want, please tell me, Lord. Change my heart and turn my ears to You.

Lord, it’s getting harder and harder to deny the feeling that I’m not the one You intend to be by his side forever. It makes me want to give up.

It is painful but I’m putting our weary hearts at Your ever loving palms.  

Please let us both rest in Your promise that You will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born (Isaiah 66:9). You have been so faithful to us from the first day and I know that You will get us through this. I trust that You will stay with us through this transition, Dear God. Help us to be strong.

I love his light and warmth but summer can’t last too long. Help us through this storm. Help us delight in a brand-new season that You are preparing for our lives, though separately.

Dear God, You are a witness that our love was true but maybe it isn’t yet the one You meant to last. If it is written in Your will for us to be part of each other’s lives again, give us the grace to wait.

Maybe the hardest thing to do is the right thing to do. I love him but for now, I am giving up, Dear God. I am giving up before we are totally drained of the love You taught us to give. I am giving up before we could hurt each other any further.

Please guide his every step. Take care of him because I couldn’t. As much as I want to, I couldn’t. Comfort him, Lord. We are both hurting. We are crushed. We are weary. We need You.

He has so much love to share so please lead him to the right person who will give him the support I wasn’t able to give. Someone who will share his dreams and passions. Someone who will sing for him the way I couldn’t. Someone who will love him unconditionally every second for the rest of his life.

I want the best for him, Lord. You know I do. I can’t hide anything from You.

I am letting him go. Help me bear this pain, Dear Father.

Help us heal.