26 Little Lessons I Learned About Love From Relationships Without A Label

Paolo Raeli

1. Just because there isn’t a label attached to it doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t real.

2. Sometimes someone loves you the best they can but they aren’t right for you.

3. It isn’t your job to prove you are worthy of someone’s love.

4. Sometimes the things you feel for almosts are as deep if not deeper than real relationships.

5. You aren’t stupid for falling in love with someone like this.

6. There is no finite definition of love. You decide.

7. It takes a lot longer to get over someone you didn’t actually date. And that’s okay.

8. If they don’t date you within the first month, the chances of them dating you ever are slim.

9. These relationships will taint real ones because of the pedestal you put them on.

10. If you can get over this people and forgive them it will be your strongest friendship.

11. Your friends will come to hate this person while it drags on.

12. And hate how much you talk about them.

13. Even if you don’t feel like you are, you’re settling.

14. Physical relationships aren’t always going to lead to emotional ones.

15. You can’t force something that just isn’t there.

16. A history doesn’t always mean you are entitled to their future.

17. Clinging to the past won’t change the present.


18. It’s admirable to not give up on someone but you have to know when enough is enough.

19. You don’t deserve to be the person someone turns to when everything else goes wrong.

20. The hardest part of moving on will be cutting them off because people become like habits and you each are used to running in circles.

21. When you find yourself in a new relationship explaining the relationship to someone will be difficult.

22. The words ‘just friends’ hurts a little bit.

23. Endings don’t have to be bad and bitter just because the relationship was dramatic.

24. You learn how to love in these relationships but you’ll struggle in future relationships with receiving love.

25. Relationships aren’t supposed to go on that long and be that complicated or confusing.

26. Learning to love yourself more than someone else is going to be the hardest thing for you. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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