30 Things You Need To Realize If You Feel Like You’re Settling In Love

God & Man

1. If you’re always the one starting conversation and keeping it going, you’re settling in love.

2. If you’re always the one making plans that he seems to cancel last minute, you’re settling in love.

3. If you’re meeting him more than halfway and he lets you every time, you’re settling in love.

4. If he leaves you even a little bit anxious it’s because you don’t trust him and you’re settling in love.

5. If you find yourself worrying about what you’ll say, you’re settling in love.

6. If you’re afraid of making the wrong move that everything you say and do you are proceeding with caution, you’re settling in love.

7. If he hurts you and lets you down more than he makes you happy, you’re settling in love.

8. If you’re afraid you’ll lose him, he probably isn’t yours to keep because any right person would never make you feel that way and you’re settling in love.

9. If he doesn’t want to introduce you to his friends and family, you’re settling in love.

10. If he plays the what if and the maybe game holding tight to one day that never seems to become a reality you’re settling in love.

11. If he hooks up with you but doesn’t want a label you’re settling in love.

12. If he only ever talks to you late at night or when he’s drunk you’re settling in love.

13. If it appears he cares only through social media of likes on instagram and snapchat views and conversations you each forget you’re settling in love.

14. If he only ever wants to meet for drinks and doesn’t take you on a real date you’re settling in love.

15. If you’re afraid to ask for something more because you know he’ll come up with some excuse as to why things are fine the way they are, you’re settling in love.

16. If your friends don’t like him there is probably a reason because you’re settling for less than you deserve.

17. If you’re afraid your parents won’t approve it’s because they won’t and your settling in love.

18. If he’s keeping you some secret you’re settling in love.

19. If you have to wonder how he feels and what place you have in his life you’re settling in love.

20. If you are saying I love you in hopes it’ll make him stay, you’re settling in love.

21. If he’s using you emotionally or physically you’re settling in love.

22. If he’s become more of a habit you can’t break as oppose to someone who adds quality to your life you are settling in love.

23. If he hurts you. Disrespects you. Makes you cry or question your self worth you’re settling in love.

24. If he’s said sorry one too many times you’re settling in love.

25. If he gives and takes love and makes you feel like it’s something you have to earn, you’re settling in love.

26. If you love him in only moments instead of fully it’s because you know there is a side to him not good for you, you’re settling in love.

27. If you love the idea of what you could be one day and fall for false promises, you aren’t looking at the reality of the relationship and you’re settling in love.

28. If the thought of walking away breaks you to the point you can’t function without him, depending on him isn’t something that you should seek in someone else, you’re settling in love.

29. If you know in your heart you deserve better, then go for it. Because you don’t deserve someone’s half hearted love. You don’t deserve the bits and pieces of what someone can give. You don’t deserve to associate love with pain and heartbreak.

30. You settle in love because you haven’t figured out how to love yourself first. And that’s okay. But you’ll never find the love you deserve giving away your heart to those who aren’t worthy of it. You’ll never find the love you’re seeking when you continue to go back to these men that broke you in hopes they’ll be the one who put you back together. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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